One Giant Leap
by daydreamer4
Summary: This is a series of vignettes based on Luke's discovery of the daughter he never knew. COMPLETE.
1. The Beginning

_**Author's Note:** So I was pretty much unspoiled for this season and then I read the spoiler to end all spoilers and I've been irritated by it. This is my way of dealing with that irritation. The focus of this story is Luke and I will be completely ignoring Rory's existence and issues. This story is a series of small vignettes with no transitions. **DO NOT proceed unless you are already spoiled through 6.09.** And, if you don't know, you might actually be better off than the rest of us!_

One Giant Leap

It had been days since the little girl waltzed into the diner took his picture and snatched a lock of his usually covered hair. It had been night after night of tossing and turning trying to figure out if what she had told him could be true. Could she be looking for her long-lost father? Furthermore, could that long-lost man be Luke?

He'd been irritable and stand-offish ever since that day. He hadn't told anyone what the girl had said. He had hardly even mentioned it to Lorelai. He made a passing comment about a girl who'd come in and irritated him, but Lorelai chalked it up to his normal irritation with children. How could she know that the girl was his potential daughter?

Luke looked at himself in the mirror as he got ready to face yet another day. His face seemed thinner than usual. His eyes, at times blues, were steelier gray than ever. The dark circles under his eyes were getting darker by the day. He wondered how soon it would be before his eyes actually sunk into his head and dissolve along with the thoughts in his head.

He splashed some water on his face and saw the 40-something man in his reflection for the first time. Luke had always been a loner. He pretended that he didn't care that much about town events and people, but it was more that he cared too much. It hurt him when he saw others let down. He always tried to lend a hand when he could but he didn't over burden himself. Maybe it was because his mother had died when he was young and he felt let down. By the time Rachel left he'd lost his mother, his father and at the time, the love of his life. That was the turning point. That was when he decided that a cranky exterior helped to camouflage the feelings he had on the inside. If he told the world he didn't care, then he could convince himself and it would be true.

Luke sighed as he wiped the water off his hands and he tried to recall what the girl who'd visited him looked like. Did she look like him? Was it even possible? He'd been taking a silent inventory over the last few days to figure out if the possibility that he was a father was there. Luke wasn't a one-night stand kind of guy. He'd always been a relationship type of man. He could never bring himself to date two women at once, let alone more. He mentally ticked off a list in his head. The big relationships were accounted for: Rachel, Nicole and of course, Lorelai, but who else after that?

Luke shook his head, but he knew he had to be honest with himself if he was going to have any chance of figuring out if what the girl told him was true. If he was being honest he'd have to add Crazy Carrie to the list. They were in high school and Luke was drunk, but he remembered it, much as he'd like to forget, but there was no way the girl belonged to her. He had briefly dated Tabitha before he got serious with Rachel, but the girl was too young to be Tabitha's. Luke tried to think back, but was pulled briskly from his thoughts.

"Hey," Lorelai said coming up behind him in the bathroom and wrapping her arms around his waist. "It's early."

"I know," he said tapping her hand with his own.

"It's also Sunday," Lorelai said. "I thought Caesar was opening and you were staying in bed with me today."

"Yeah," Luke replied turning. "I forgot to tell you that Caesar had a family thing this morning. I have to open."

Lorelai surveyed his face and saw how exhausted he looked. "You okay?" she asked reaching out and feeling his face with the palm of her hand. "You look tired."

"I'm okay," he lied. "I didn't sleep very well last night."

"I'm sorry," Lorelai replied. "I didn't steal too many covers did I?"

"No, you're fine," Luke replied. "I just had some things on my mind."

"Can I help?"

Luke hesitated a moment and finally replied, "No."

"Not convincing," Lorelai said as she walked by him and took a seat on the closed toilet. "Spill."

"I have to get to work," Luke insisted turning away from her.

"Hey," Lorelai said reaching out and grabbing his hand. "This is me here."

"I know," Luke said not looking her in the eyes. "I'm really okay."

"Luke," Lorelai insisted in that way she had about her. He knew he wasn't off the hook and if he didn't come up with something that she wouldn't let it go. He decided to touch on a topic that was fairly close to what was on his mind.

"I'm getting old," he said.

Lorelai grinned at his response. "You're not getting old."

"I'm getting too old to do certain things," Luke said.

"Like what?" Lorelai asked him.

"Like have kids," he said honestly. "I'll be the old dad. No one wants their dad to be the old dad."

Lorelai took a deep breath. She knew this day was coming. They had briefly touched on the topic of children when Lorelai was half-asleep. She remembered when she thought, for a brief moment, that she might be pregnant. She had assumed Luke would bolt if she told him, but she found out later that he seemed to like the idea of having children.

"Being the old dad is a lot better than being the young dad," Lorelai tried to reassure him. "I remember when people used to think I was Rory's babysitter. It's not fun."

"No," Luke agreed. "But, I'm not getting any younger."

"Are you saying you want to have kids, like, now?" Lorelai asked dreading the answer. For as much as she wanted to have a child with Luke the thought of actually being pregnant and being a mother at her age frightened her. Like Luke, she felt like she would be the old mom.

"I'm saying," Luke sighed. "I'm not saying anything. I've just been thinking about how old I feel sometimes. I don't know if I'm ready for boys and dating and the birds and bees and college and walking her down the aisle."

"Well you've got to actually go through the feeding and diaper phase first, but you're thinking ahead, that's good," Lorelai said.

"Yeah," Luke said not really listening to Lorelai's response.

"So you'd like to have a daughter?" Lorelai asked.

"Huh?"

"You said something about boys and you'd have to walk _her_ down the aisle," Lorelai informed him.

"Oh, well I must have been thinking about a girl because you have Rory," Luke said absently.

"Right," Lorelai said not quite believing him.

"I mean I might not even be a good dad," Luke said suddenly. "I'm not exactly a kid kind of guy. I could probably fix a bike or build a tree house, but that's about it. How old are kids when they need a tree house? Like 10, 11? How tall are you at 10 or 11?"

"Luke, where is this coming from?" Lorelai asked standing. "We're talking about a baby here okay? You don't have to worry about bikes and tree houses for a while."

"I know," Luke nodded. "It's just something to think about."

"So you'd like to have kids?"

"I don't know," Luke replied honestly. "I like the idea of kids. I love the idea of having kids with you. I don't know if I'm ready for it, but it's something I've thought about. What about you?"

"I've thought about it too," Lorelai said realizing that they were having a very real, life-altering conversation in the bathroom at five-thirty on a Sunday morning.

"And you're terrified," Luke said knowingly.

"Terrified might be a strong word," Lorelai protested, but only slightly.

"Maybe, but you are," Luke insisted.

"Maybe I am," she replied a little defensively. "But you're the one in the bathroom at five-thirty in the morning freaking out about being the old dad. You're not exactly okay with it either."

"I didn't say I was," Luke said more forcefully than he's intended. He saw her tense slightly and he knew this was a mistake. "I've got to go to work."

Luke walked out of the bathroom and left Lorelai to wonder what had made him react to strongly to the conversation. He'd been tense the last few days and now he was losing sleep over the thought of being too old to have children. Something didn't seem right to Lorelai, but she chose to ignore it for the time being. Luke threw on his baseball cap and stomped down the stairs into the diner. He just needed more time to figure out what he was feeling.

Three days later Luke sat in his truck and found it hard to breath. He felt as though he was gasping for air, but his need for it couldn't be satiated. It felt like only moments ago he found himself in a middle school gymnasium. His eyes darted around the small booths that made up the science fair. He wasn't really sure why he was there, nor was he sure who he was looking for. The girl that had come to the diner had brown hair, or was it black? The memory was a blur. He remembered a ponytail, but girls changed their hair everyday. He scanned the crowd until his eyes rested on a raven-haired girl in the far corner of the gym. He swallowed hard and walked over to her table.

Luke didn't have a plan. He drove to the school on a whim. The name and location of the science fair were one of roughly five things he remembered about the girl: Luke might be her father. Check. She had darker hair. Check. Her science fair was being held today. Check. She had swiped some hair that was ostensibly being tested to find out of he was her father. Check.

"Hi," the girl smiled up at him when she saw him walk up to the booth.

"Hi," Luke replied.

"You didn't have to come you know," she told him.

Luke scanned the posters that lined the booth and he saw fairly good illustrations of DNA strands and photos. He let his eyes scan to the right and that's when he saw it. There were three Polaroid photos, one of Luke and two of other men he'd never seen. The other photos had lines drawn through them and Luke's was left unmarked. The girl followed his eyes.

"Does this mean what I think it means?" Luke asked.

"Yep," the girl affirmed. "Do you want my stool?"

Luke said nothing, he simply nodded in disbelief. The girl hopped off her stool and pushed it toward him. After he was seated she shoved a written report into his hands.

"It's all there," she said. "My uncle helped me with the tests."

Luke sat in his truck and relived feeling the weight of the booklet in his hands. He read a bunch of words that didn't make sense. The only things that jumped out were 'Luke Danes' and '99.9 certainty of paternity.' April, his daughter April, had explained that she decided to find her dad as part of her science project. Her mother had narrowed it down to three men and instead of taking them all on Maury Povich she had decided to conduct her own tests under the supervision of her mad scientist uncle. That wasn't what she's told him verbatim, but it was what Luke heard.

He took a deep breath. April's mother was Anna Nardini. Anna was the first girl that Luke had taken home from a bar. It was a few months after Rachel had left him. He had been inconsolable and started to frequent a bar half way between Stars Hollow and Woodbridge. It was a small, dreary place, but they provided him with enough alcohol to make his mind forget about Rachel. Anna was the waitress there and she was nice to him. They talked like regular people and she made Luke feel like a normal human being again. Then, one night their talking became more and he ended up going home with her.

He barely remembered what happened and the next morning he felt ashamed and it was at that moment that he decided he needed to get his life together. Rachel leaving wasn't the end of the world and he had to stop acting like it. He visited the bar one more time and Anna had told him to forget about it. She knew he wasn't looking for anything serious and neither was she. That was the last time they spoke, ten years ago.

Luke thought about how he'd started to get his life back together. He worked hard to get the diner going and he started to have success. It wasn't long after that Lorelai and Rory had entered his life like a cyclone. Lorelai brought humor and interaction into his lonely world. She made him feel alive again and he started to slowly forget about the pain that Rachel had left. Sure, Rachel would come and go over the years and it would be a long time before Luke realized that Lorelai was much more than a friend to him, but at the time he felt like his life was getting back to normal and he forgot about Anna Nardini and that little bar half-way to Woodbridge.

Luke finally became aware that the sun had set long ago and he let his eyes focus on the darkness around him. He didn't know how long he had sat in his truck in the parking lot of the middle school, but it was easily hours. He glanced at his watch and swore under his breath. It was ten-thirty and he should have been home hours ago. He reached into his pocket and turned on his cell phone. It lit up quickly and the voicemail chirped almost immediately.

"You have four new messages," the computerized voice told him.

"Hey, it's me," Lorelai's voice said simply. "I was thinking Chinese for dinner. Al is bringing back the Chinese New Year in November spectacular and I was hoping you could pick something up on the way home. Call me."

Luke deleted the message knowing full well that it was too late for Chinese food and that there were three other messages from Lorelai to follow.

"Hi," she said sounding a little irritated. "Is your phone off? It's going right to voicemail. It's kind of late for Chinese now. I'll try you at the diner."

Luke skipped ahead again.

"Okay," Lorelai said sounding very irritated and slightly confused. "I just called the diner and Lane said you asked her close up today. She said you haven't been in the diner since three and I'm wondering where you are. Call me, please."

Luke rubbed his eyes and waited for the last message to play.

"Luke, I'm starting to get a little nervous," she said. He could hear the fear in her voice. He felt awful knowing that she was so worried about him. He should have left his phone on. "It's about nine and I haven't heard from you since this morning. I know today isn't the 'dark day' so if you could just call me and let me know you're okay and I can call off the National Guard search dogs that would be great. I hope you're okay. Call me."

Luke quickly disconnected from his voicemail and dialed Lorelai's number. He waited while it rang.

"Where are you?" she answered the phone frantically.

"I'm okay," he said. "I'm in Woodbridge."

"Woodbridge?" Lorelai asked. "Why are you there? Why didn't you tell me you had to go there? I don't want to be one of those women that needs to know where you are at all times, but you scared the hell out of me."

"I know," Luke said quietly. "I'm sorry. I had to be in Woodbridge today. I…I had a meeting at the bank that I forgot about." The lie came so easily. Why? Why couldn't he just tell her the truth? Granted, it wasn't a phone conversation, but why did he feel the need to lie completely.

"Well the last time I was at a bank it closed by six," Lorelai said. "Where have you been for the last four and half hours?"

"I'm sorry," Luke said again. "I went to Sniffy's. I haven't seen Buddy and Maize in a while and we were catching up."

"I wish you would have told me that was your plan for the night," Lorelai said. "I feel like an idiot about now. I called half the town looking for you."

"I'm sorry," he said sincerely. "I should have told you. Sometimes I forget that you need to know these things."

"Fine," Lorelai said calming down. "You'll be home soon?"

"Yeah," Luke said. "You don't have to wait up. I know you have that conference tomorrow. They'll probably be in early."

"Yeah, but I might wait for you anyway," Lorelai said.

"Okay," Luke said as he pulled out of the parking lot. "I'll see you in a little while."

Luke hung up the phone and sighed. He didn't think it was possible to feel worse about the situation until now. Not only was he an instant father, but he had lied about it to the woman he loved.

"I like the strawberry," April said after she finished taste-testing three different slices of pie. "You should definitely ditch the peach."

"I'll keep that in mind," Luke said as he cleared the plates.

Before he'd left the science fair he'd extended an invitation to April to come back to the diner to visit him whenever she wanted. It appeared that today was the day she decided to take him up on his offer. He silently thanked the Powers That Be that Lorelai was in Hartford attending a conference all day. He still hadn't gotten the nerve to tell her about April, although he knew the day was fast approaching.

"My mom didn't know you could cook," April said matter-of-factly as she shoveled the pie into her mouth. "I'll have to tell her she was wrong."

"I appreciate that," Luke said. April was a very precocious, articulate child. He figured that must have come from Anna because he didn't feel he had either trait in him. He still had not contacted Anna, mostly because he didn't have a clue what to say. In the meantime he offered April a place to hang out and possibly get to know her a little better.

"So, did you get a ribbon for the science fair or anything?" Luke asked making conversation.

"Yeah, I finally won!" she replied excitedly. As she dropped her fork onto her plate her fingers got covered in the runny strawberry remnants. Luke seemed to only be able to focus on April's now sticky, strawberry covered fingers. She was very animated as she spoke about the ribbon, but all Luke could see was her goo-covered hands.

"Here," he said reaching across the counter and handing her a napkin. "Your fingers have strawberry all over them."

"Thanks," she replied as she wiped her hands.

"So what are girls your age into?" Luke asked. "You still play with Barbies and stuff?"

April giggled at his question. "No," she said. "I like school. Science is my favorite subject and I spend a lot of time on my computer. Do you have e-mail? Right now I'm beta testing this new interface for Yahoo and it's very interesting."

"Beta testing?" Luke asked.

"You know, when you get to try something out before the general public," April said simply. "Do you have e-mail?"

"I don't even own a computer," Luke replied.

"No computer?" April asked agog. "Are you serious?"

"My fiancée has a laptop, but I haven't really looked at it," Luke replied feeling uncomfortable. The diner was relatively quiet, but he felt like everyone was staring at him. He'd never really taken much interest in children and he felt like he was paying special attention to April. But then, why shouldn't he? She was his daughter after all.

"You can get a free account," April told him. "You'll need a name though. How about Pie baker? That's a pretty good name."

"Pie baker? I don't think I want to be known for my baking abilities all over the Internet," Luke said. "What's your e-mail address?"

"Double-helix 95," April replied.

"Isn't that a science thing?"

"Yeah, it's part of DNA."

"You're awfully young to be so interested in DNA," Luke said. "Are you sure you don't like playing with dolls or something?"

"I'm sure," April said. "I guess when you don't know where your DNA comes from for your whole life you get a little obsessed with it."

Luke had no response for her. How a ten year old could be so knowledgeable about DNA and paternity he would never know. She spoke like an adult and in many ways reminded him of Rory when she younger, her nose stuck in a book, speaking very articulately for her age.

"I guess," Luke replied.

"You know, I was glad it was you," April said suddenly. "Of the three pictures I took I thought you looked the nicest."

April didn't seem as though she was looking for a response. She just shared that information with him and took a long sip of her water before she hopped off the stool and put on her bike helmet.

"Okay, well bye," she said suddenly waving quickly. She'd been there for about an hour and Luke was getting to the point where he couldn't think of anything to talk about anyway.

"Hey, are you okay to get home?" Luke asked.

"I'll be fine," April told him. "My uncle is meeting me on Plum Street."

"Okay," Luke nodded.

"Hey Luke," she said walking closer to the counter. "Do you think I could come over every Friday after school?"

Luke looked into the girl's wide eyes and he couldn't say no. He found that he didn't want to tell her no. "Of course," he replied. "As long as it's safe to get here you can come over anytime you want."

"Thanks!" she smiled brightly at him. "See you later."

"Bye April," Luke replied.

"Hey," Luke called as he entered the house. Luke recognized that Lorelai was on the phone and quietly walked into the kitchen, trying not to interrupt.

"Okay, I will," Lorelai was talking to someone on the phone. "Bye."

"You're home early," Lorelai said. "I just got back from my conference."

"Yeah, I figured I owed you one after that late night a couple days ago," Luke said.

"I thought you were going to make that up by wearing the bull fighter's uniform," Lorelai teased him.

"Yeah," Luke smirked. "I have to talk to you about something."

"Okay, zero to serious in a millisecond," Lorelai replied. "This doesn't sound good."

"You might want to sit," Luke said pulling out a chair from the kitchen table.

"And now you want me to sit?" Lorelai asked. "Okay, just, whatever it is, tell me quick. Make it like a band-aid; just hit me with it all at once."

"Okay," Luke said as he took a seat across from her. "I was in Woodbridge the other day, you know that much. Well I wasn't at the bank."

Luke shifted uncomfortably in his chair not knowing what to say next. Lorelai sat silent for a moment and then it hit her.

"Oh my God, you're having an affair," Lorelai said suddenly holding her hands to her face. "How could you do this?"

"No," Luke said quickly taking her hand in his. "I'm not having an affair. I'm…geez, this is hard. I was in Woodbridge to go to a science fair at the middle school."

"A science fair?" Lorelai questioned. "Luke if you're having an affair just tell me. Don't make up stories about science fairs."

"I'm not having an affair," Luke sighed as he stood up. "Look, a few weeks ago there was a girl who visited me at the diner remember? I told you she was a weird girl with a bike helmet and she was asking me all these questions?"

"Yes," Lorelai remembered.

"Well it was her science fair," Luke said. "What I didn't tell you at the time was that she somehow got a fistful of my hair and she was doing some sort of experiment at her science fair."

"I don't get it," Lorelai said waiting for the other show to drop. "This girl steals some of your hair and you go to her science fair in Woodbridge? Connect the dots please."

Luke had imagined this moment over and over in his head and there was just no good way to tell her. He took a deep breath and resolved to just tell her in one breath.

"I'm her father," Luke finally let out quietly.

"What?" Lorelai asked confused.

"Apparently, I'm her dad," Luke said taking a seat across from her again.

"You have a kid? You have a daughter?"

"It looks that way."

"I don't understand," Lorelai said in disbelief. "I mean, I didn't think you were a monk before we met, but how could you have a daughter and not know about it? Oh my God, you didn't know about it right? I mean this isn't some secret family you have stashed away somewhere is it?"

"No, I don't have a family stashed away somewhere. I didn't know about her. I met her mother at a really bad time in my life. My dad had just died and Rachel had just left town. It was a one-time thing."

"A one-time thing?" Lorelai squinted as she spoke as if she were really thinking about what he told her. "And you've been lying to me for weeks. That freak out in the bathroom last week, that wasn't random. You've been thinking about this. You've been keeping this from me."

"I didn't know how to tell you," Luke said helplessly. "I didn't quite believe it myself at first."

"But now you do?" Lorelai said standing up and pacing the kitchen. "What proof does this girl have?"

"April," Luke said.

"April who?" Lorelai asked confused.

"April is her name," Luke offered.

"Your daughter April," Lorelai said suddenly feeling hot tears stream down her cheeks. Luke stood up quickly and wrapped his arms around her. "I'm sorry," she said. "I shouldn't react like this. I mean, I have Rory so what difference does it make right?"

"It makes a difference," Luke said soothingly. He knew how much of a difference it made.

"I guess I just thought…" Lorelai trailed off and buried her face into his shoulder. She let him hold her tightly. It was as if his strong arms were grounding her in reality. Little did she know that holding her was the thing that was keeping Luke sane at the moment.

"You thought my kid would be your kid," Luke said simply. It's what he thought too. He never imagined having kids with anyone but Lorelai. With Rachel he was too young to think about the responsibility of a child. With Nicole he knew they didn't love each other enough to bring a kid into the mix. But, with Lorelai, it just seemed right.

"I guess," Lorelai cried. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, I shouldn't be crying right now." Lorelai pulled away from him and wiped her eyes with the back of her hands. She composed herself quickly.

"How old is she?"

"Ten."

"How do you know she's yours?" she asked. "You said she took your hair?"

"She was doing this DNA project for school," Luke explained. "She tested me and two other guys and I'm it. I'm her dad."

"Wait, you're taking the word of little girl? Have you had any tests done?"

"No, her uncle is a lab technician. She was pretty thorough."

"Luke, how old is she? I don't care if she's Doogie Howser you need to get another test done."

"I've seen the results Lorelai. They're 99.9 accurate."

"I didn't know Fischer Price made home DNA kits," Lorelai said. "You're seriously just going to take a class project's word for it?"

"I know Anna," Luke said. "I slept with her ten years ago. There's no reason to think that it's not true."

"No reason except two other men," Lorelai shot at him.

"Look, she's my kid," Luke replied getting angry. "I'm sorry you're having a hard time dealing with that, but it's not something I'm having an easy time with either. I've been thinking about this for weeks."

"Yeah and you never once mentioned it to me," Lorelai said.

Luke knew she had him on that count. "I didn't believe it myself," Luke said. "I had to let it sink in."

"What made it sink in? And please don't tell me it was her dazzling report illustrations."

"It's true whether you want to believe it or not," Luke insisted. "I'm sorry if you can't accept it, but it's something we're gonna have to deal with."

The moment of silence was broken by Luke's ringing cell phone. "Let it ring," Lorelai said. "We have to finish this."

"I have to answer it," Luke digging it out of his pocket.

"Who calls you on that phone anyway?" Lorelai asked.

Luke glanced at the caller ID. "It's April," Luke said.

Lorelai let her hands, firmly planted on her hips, fall to her sides in defeat.

"Hello," Luke said.

Lorelai listened to his side of the conversation for a moment. "No I didn't have a chance to set up an e-mail account yet…Yeah it sounds easy enough…I'm sure you could."

Lorelai watched Luke walk out of the kitchen and into the living room. Suddenly the space between the kitchen and living room seemed much larger and Luke seemed worlds away. Lorelai grabbed her coat off the back of the chair and tossed it over her shoulders as she walked out into the dusky evening.

TBC


	2. Winds of Change

_Author's Note: Thank you for the kind reviews of this story. I wasn't sure how it would be received since it clearly sounds like an alternate reality fan fic. I should have mentioned in the first chapter that I don't own Gilmore Girls nor the puzzling idea of Luke having a ten-year-old daughter. They are the property of ASP and Co. However, since she put this somewhat unsavory idea in our heads I am playing in her reality for a moment.

* * *

_

Winds of Change

Lorelai wandered around the town aimlessly for hours. Her first stop was Weston's and after the pie and coffee didn't help her mood she ended up at the movie theatre. Kirk, sensing her current state, hadn't bothered charging her and entrance fee. She knew it would only be a matter of time before the town heard about Lorelai's mood and talk turned of her relationship being over once again. However, the question was valid. Was Lorelai's relationship over? The easy answer was no, but now that Luke had a daughter it was certainly different.

She made her way back home well after midnight and expected Luke to have gone to bed. Surely he took her exit as some sort of tantrum and he'd gone to sleep to punish her. However, when she entered the foyer she saw the back of Luke's head and he sat in front of the television watching a baseball game.

"Hi," she said removing her coat.

"Hey," Luke replied turning off the television and turning toward her.

"I'm sorry I left," she told him. "I just needed a minute."

"You needed a few hours, but it's understandable," Luke replied.

"Yeah," Lorelai said taking a seat next to him on the couch.

"I shouldn't have answered the phone," Luke offered. "I just gave April my cell number and it was the first time she used it. I didn't want to start off on the wrong foot."

"Right," Lorelai nodded. "I don't want you to start off on the wrong foot either."

"I appreciate that."

"I'm sorry for how I reacted. I guess I never thought about you having children. At least, you having a kid was always pretty closely linked to me having another kid anyway. I didn't mean to imply that I was--"

Luke put up a hand to cut her off. "I know. You don't have to apologize. I've been dealing with this for a few weeks and I kind of dropped it on you at once. That wasn't fair."

Lorelai nodded in agreement. The news that Luke had a daughter was shocking enough, but to find out that he'd known for a few weeks and not told her was another matter altogether. However, Lorelai knew how easy it was to keep a secret. She'd done it before and she was, at the moment, doing it again for no other reason than to keep things simple between them.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked tucking her hair behind her ears.

"I wasn't sure," Luke said. "I didn't really know if it was true and I didn't want to throw the possibility out there if there was no reason to. Then, when I found out for sure, I was in shock. It was like it was real and I knew it was real, but if I didn't tell you I could still chalk it up to a really weird dream. Does that make any sense?"

"Yeah, it does," Lorelai offered. "When I was pregnant with Rory I knew for weeks. I had a feeling and then I took the test and all the signs were there telling me I was going to have a baby, but I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone. Saying it out loud made it real."

"That's exactly it," Luke replied.

"So what does she look like?" Lorelai asked. "Does she look like you?"

"I don't really think she does," Luke said. "She has dark hair. It's kind of wavy and crazy looking. You know how kid hair looks. She's really smart. She's really into science. She hates my peach pie so that puts her in agreement with about 40 percent of Stars Hollow."

"Myself included," Lorelai quipped. "So she's been to the diner?"

"She stopped by today," Luke said quietly. "It was the first time, other than the time she came and took a sample of my hair anyway. She asked if she could come over every Friday to visit."

"So you're having your version of Friday night dinner," Lorelai tried to make light. "Without the guilt and blinding migraines of course."

"I suppose," Luke agreed. "Although I think I've got the guilt thing covered. I didn't have any idea she existed. I've missed so much."

"Have you talked to her mother?"

"No. I wouldn't even know what to say. Anna was a friend to me at a time when I was really lost. The night we…well it was obviously a one-time thing and we both agreed that it was nice, but we weren't looking for anything. I just can't believe she never said anything."

"Luke," Lorelai said hesitantly. "I don't want you to get upset, but if this little girl had to test 3 different men to find her father, maybe you should run your own DNA test."

Luke gave Lorelai a hard look. "I know you'd never run from your responsibilities, but you're awfully quick to accept the findings of this test. I just think you might want to make sure before you make commitments to this girl."

"She's my daughter," Luke said tersely.

"Okay," Lorelai sighed. "If her test is good enough for you then it's good enough for me." Lorelai didn't believe what she just said, but for now it would save an argument and for the moment that was what she cared about.

"Thank you," Luke said.

"So, where do we go from here?" Lorelai asked. "Do you want me to go with you to talk to Anna? Should I meet April?" The name April sounded funny coming out of Lorelai's mouth. It was as if it was a foreign name.

"I want you to meet her," Luke said. "I know I have to talk to Anna, but right now she hasn't really made any attempt to contact me. April has her uncle drop her off right now."

"Have you met him?"

"No."

"Okay, well just tell me what you want me to do and I'll do it," Lorelai said softly.

"Well, April is supposed to come to the diner on Friday for dinner. She said she'd stop in around four and I was thinking you could be there?" Luke asked hesitantly.

"I'm there," Lorelai affirmed.

"Thank you," Luke said. "Well I've got an early day tomorrow so I'm gonna head on up to bed."

"Okay, I'm just going to finish up a few things down here," Lorelai said. She watched as Luke went up the stairs and waited until she knew he was settled into bed before she switched out the light and shed a few tears over the loss of the life she was beginning to know. She knew deep inside that everything was changing and she could either adapt or be lost along the way. After a few minutes of tears she resigned herself to the change and resolved to move forward with Luke and his daughter because she loved him. She decided that the time for tears was over and she'd never Luke know that she once wept for the life they almost had.

* * *

Luke nervously cleaned the diner as he waited for April to show up for her second Friday visit. After talking things over with Lorelai he knew that he would eventually have to talk to Anna. He also knew he had to talk to April and find out what she was looking for from him. It seemed like she was interested in knowing him, but did she really need a father? He had already missed so much time.

Lorelai knew that April would be at the diner around four o'clock and Luke let her know that if she wanted to stop by it might be nice. He had filled three awkward visits with April, but now that Lorelai knew about her existence he thought she might be a great ice-breaker. She was good with kids and they seemed to like her. Luke thought it was probably because they made similar mentalities. Lorelai had asked him on more than one occasion to make her M&M pancakes and that in itself seemed like a juvenile request.

The bells above the diner jingled and Luke turned to find April standing in the doorway. She wore a light blue backpack that looked to be full of books.

"Hi," Luke said as the girl walked up to the counter and hopped on a stool.

"Hi," April replied. She took the heavy bag off her shoulders and tossed it on the counter.

"Looks like you have quite a few books there," Luke commented.

"I've got some catching up to do," April said. "I was sick on Tuesday and Wednesday."

"You were sick?" Luke asked concerned. "Are you okay now? Should you be home in bed? Have you seen a doctor?"

"You sound like my mom," April said rolling her eyes. "I just had a cold and I'm fine now." She grabbed a menu from the counter and began to read it over.

"Well you're having chicken soup," Luke said taking the menu from her. "Chicken soup, crackers and, if you're still hungry, a fruit salad."

"Yuck," April said.

"It's good for you," Luke insisted.

"Can we bargain on the carrots?" April asked.

"Bargain on the carrots?" Luke asked.

"Yeah, I hate carrots," April explained. "My mom usually makes a deal with me on the veggies. Like, I'll eat two pieces of broccoli in exchange for an extra scoop of ice cream for dessert."

"No wonder you're sick," Luke muttered.

"I'm not sick, I'm fine," April said. "So, how do you feel about straining the carrots out of the soup?"

"Not good," Luke said sternly.

"How finely chopped are they?"

"The carrots?"

"Yes."

"They're chunks."

April turned up her nose and sighed. "If I can have a milkshake with it you've got yourself a deal."

"Strawberry only," Luke said.

"Triple Chocolate, extra large," April countered.

"Strawberry and you can have a side order of fries," Luke replied.

"Deal," April smiled as if she'd just won a contest.

"So you're really feeling better?" Luke asked.

"I'm about 98 percent," April replied.

"Good."

Luke went into the back to get April's soup and he was surprised how easily the feeling of being alarmed came to him. When Jess lived with him he got easily upset, but the only time he'd felt alarmed was when Jess was in the car accident. Other than that, he was at an age where he could take care of himself and he knew what he needed. April seemed so young and much more fragile.

"So, I have a friend that's probably going to stop by a little later," Luke told April as he placed the bowl of soup in front of her.

"A lady friend?" April giggled.

"Yes, a lady friend," Luke affirmed. "Her name is Lorelai and she's my fiancée."

"You're getting married?" April asked suddenly not as chipper as she seemed before Luke mentioned Lorelai.

"Well we haven't set a date yet, but we are getting married," Luke said.

"Do you love her?"

"Very much," Luke said quietly.

April just nodded and focused on her soup. Luke watched as she picked around the carrots.

"I think you might like Lorelai," Luke said. "She doesn't like carrots either."

"They're not so bad," April said making a face as she said it. "If you like carrots maybe I will eventually. We have the same genes right?"

"Sure," Luke agreed. "I'll let you in on a little secret though. I didn't start to like carrots until I was about 18."

"Good to know," April said, her mood beginning to brighten.

With Lane and Caesar working Luke didn't have worry about too much and he took the opportunity to chat with April for a bit as he waited for Lorelai to show up. He glanced at the clock after a while and noticed that it was almost five and he knew April would be getting ready to leave soon.

"Sorry," Lorelai yelled as she breezed into the diner, throwing her purse on the counter. "Sorry, sorry, sorry." She took a breath. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Luke said with a grin.

"The damn stove that Sookie had delivered mere weeks ago after the fire decided to crap out on her and she ended up having to cook her main course at home. She commandeered a cart and Michel, of course, was not happy about it, but Sookie had to cart between her house and the inn for the last hour and I've been on the phone trying to figure out how the hell you return a Viking stove from Canada, not that we haven't had this problem before, but anyway, I'm late and I'm sorry. You must be April."

April looked up at Lorelai incredulous. Luke's fiancée seemed to have more energy than most children in her class.

"Lorelai, this is April," Luke started the introductions. "April, this is my fiancée Lorelai. I should warn you that she normally talks just as fast even when she isn't frazzled."

"Hi April," Lorelai said catching her breath. "It's so nice to meet you."

"You too," April said shyly.

"So," Lorelai continued to speak as she took the stool next to April. "Luke told me that you found him through some DNA testing? That's quite complicated for a girl your age."

"It wasn't that hard," April said as she sucked down the remainder of her milkshake.

"You know, I have a daughter too," Lorelai said. Luke picked up on a hint of sadness in her tone. Although Rory and Lorelai had talked at her birthday party things were far from okay between then two. "She always liked science, but I don't think she ever attempted DNA testing."

"How old is your daughter?" April asked.

"She just turned 21," Lorelai said.

"21? That's old! You don't look old enough to have a daughter that old," April told her.

"Thank you. I like her already," Lorelai told Luke. He gave her a small wink and excused himself to check on Caesar. It seemed like Lorelai and April were getting along and he hoped that would continue.

"So are you two having fun out here?" Luke asked when he came back to the counter.

"I was hoping I could get a Monte Cristo sandwich," April said giggling.

"A Monte Cristo, huh? That was on my old menu," Luke explained. "I discontinued it a while ago."

"You might want to rethink that," April said laughing and glancing at Lorelai out of the corner of her eye.

"What?" Lorelai asked guiltily when Luke gave her a look of admonishment. "You have to cater to the masses."

"Three years and you won't let the Monte Cristo go," he replied.

"Yeah and you love me for it," Lorelai smirked. "Good job kiddo." Lorelai high-fived April and it was clear that the two were now bonded in sisterhood.

Luke hid a grin and looked up as the bells above the door jingled and he came face-to-face with a memory from eleven years ago.

"Luke Danes," said the voice.

"Anna," Luke gulped, the smile fading from his lips.

"Mom," April yelled as stood up from the stool and ran over to her mother. "Hi."

"Hi April," Anna replied. "Your uncle said he brought you here last week and the week before and you didn't tell me about it."

"She didn't tell you about it?" Luke asked.

"No, she didn't tell me about it," Anna replied looking Luke in the eyes.

Lorelai turned and surveyed the now infamous Anna Nardini, mother of Luke's child. She was taller and she had long black hair that was pulled into a ponytail. Her green eyes looked tired and her skin was as pale as porcelain.

"Sorry," April said. "I meant to tell you."

"Not now April," Anna said not looking down at her daughter, but instead staring straight ahead at Luke. "Can we talk?"

Luke cleared his throat and wiped his hands on a rag quickly. "Yeah, we can talk," he replied. "Lorelai, would you mind sitting here with April?"

"I wanna talk too," April said showing her actual age for a moment.

"How about if you and I sit here and doodle all over this menu?" Lorelai asked April. "It took Luke years before he found all the comments I wrote in his menus."

"I have an apartment upstairs," Luke said. "We can talk there."

Anna followed Luke's outstretched arm and Luke leaned over to Lorelai and quietly whispered, "Thanks."

When they got to the apartment and Luke shut the door he was still unsure of what to say. Luckily Anna beat him to it.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she asked.

"What the hell am _I_ doing?" Luke asked.

"It's been eleven years," Anna said. "I thought we agreed that what happened between us was nothing special. It was a one night thing. We were two people who were a little lost and that was that."

"That was fine, but you had kid and never told me about it," Luke said feeling the anger well up in him.

"She isn't any of your concern," Anna replied.

"She's my daughter," Luke protested. "She's ten years old and I never knew she existed until she came into my diner and yanked out a fistful of my hair."

"Well I didn't know anything about that," Anna defended herself. "If I had I wouldn't have allowed her to go running around the suburbs. My brother helped her with that little project."

"You had my number," Luke said. "You knew I had a diner in town. Why didn't you ever tell me that I had a daughter?"

"How could I know you'd have the same phone number you had ten years ago? Also, in case you didn't read April's little science project, there were other possibilities for her father. Quite honestly I was shocked that it was you. I didn't think you were a real possibility."

"Aren't I lucky?" Luke mumbled sarcastically. "You had a responsibility to tell me about her. I can't believe you did this. I missed out on so much."

"Look, don't get used to April coming here okay? In case she didn't mention it she has a father who loves her very much."

"What do you mean she has a father? Are you married?"

"Yes, and I have been for seven years. Bill is the only father she's ever known and he loves her."

"Then why was she doing school projects to find her real dad?"

"April is a very smart, very special girl. Her father was having surgery and he had to donate some of his own blood beforehand. April was asking questions and studying for the science fair and after studying blood types she realized there was no way Bill could be her father. She was questioning me as her mother for a few weeks until I told her the whole sordid story of her conception. It was a fluke that all this happened."

"I'm sorry you think this was a fluke, but now that I know she's my daughter I want to be involved in her life. I think she wants that too."

"She doesn't know what she wants. She's ten years old," Anna said. She sighed before she continued. "Look, you were always a nice guy. You seem like you have a really nice life going for you here. Why would you want to add a stranger's kid to the mix?"

"Because she's my kid too," Luke said simply. "I want to know her."

"Just leave it alone," Anna said more forcefully. "She doesn't need you. She's wrapped up in this romantic fantasy where Bill isn't her dad and she has a real dad in another town. She'll grow out of it."

"Why should she? She wants a dad and I can be there for her."

"I don't doubt that," Anna replied. "I just don't think it's a good idea for her to get too attached. It's confusing and upsetting for the whole family. Bill and I have children. April is a precocious girl and it's upsetting for her brothers to hear about her real dad. If you leave it alone, then maybe she'll leave it alone."

"She asked to see me," Luke informed Anna. "I didn't seek her out. She came in here one day talking about how I could be her father. I showed up at that science fair and saw my picture with a bright red circle around it pronouncing to the world that I was a deadbeat dad, but I didn't have a clue that there was even a possibility of me having a kid. Now you want me to pretend it didn't happen? You want me to be the guy who sends a birthday card with twenty bucks in it and doesn't acknowledge her existence for the rest of the year? Well I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'm not that guy."

Luke was furious and he could feel the anger coursing through his veins. He couldn't believe the nerve of Anna. It had been ten years and he hadn't thought of her once and now she was trying to dictate the terms of his life.

"I appreciate that you're trying to do the right thing," Anna said calmly. "But Luke, please listen to me when I tell you that this isn't going to help April. She's going to be confused."

"She's a smart girl. She knows hot to DNA test for Pete's sake," Luke interjected.

"I know," Anna agreed. "But she's too young to know what she really wants. I just think it would be easier for everyone if you let her go."

"She wants to come see me," Luke said. "Your brother brought her here."

"Well that is between me and my brother. Don't think I haven't had a chat with him about this."

"I'm not going to tell her she can't see me," Luke said. "If she asks me if she can come over I won't tell her no."

"Okay," Anna replied defeated. "There's obviously nothing I can say right now to make you change your mind."

"You're damn right," Luke replied calming down.

"I'm going to go down there and take April home with me. I'm going to tell her that I'd rather she didn't contact you anymore."

"Fine," Luke said crossing his arms across his chest. "But when she calls or stops by I'm not turning her away."

Anna gave him a long, hard look and saw that he was being honest. "Fine," she replied icily. "It's been great catching up Luke." Her tone dripped with sarcasm.

"Same here," Luke called as Anna exited the apartment door. "Although a reunion about nine years ago might have been more helpful."

By the time Luke had composed himself and made it down the stairs Anna and April were gone.

"That chat went well I take it," Lorelai said when Luke emerged from upstairs. She had seen Anna fly down the stairs and take April very quickly from the premises.

"She told me she didn't want me to see April again," Luke fumed. "She said it would be better for everyone if I became Incredible Disappearing Dad. Can you believe that? I'm trying to do the right thing in all this and she tells me to stay away."

Lorelai could see how upset Luke was about the conversation with Anna and she didn't know what to say. Part of her wondered if it would be easier for April and Luke to pretend they didn't know about their relation.

"Maybe you should give it some time," Lorelai said.

"Give it time?" Luke looked at her like she had two heads.

"You have to admit that this whole thing has been kind of sudden. I mean can you really even do an effective DNA test in a week?"

Luke began to get irritated all over again. It seemed that every time he brought up his daughter Lorelai found a way to dissuade him from believing the DNA test.

"I'm sorry Luke," Lorelai tried again. "I know you don't want to hear this, but Anna is the girl's mother. She's raised her for ten years. This has got to be weird for her."

Luke stared at her in disbelief for a moment. Ever since he'd told her about April he'd known she was happy. He couldn't say he was either, but he needed her support, not her admonishment. "You know what? I get that you don't want me to have a kid. You don't have to keep trying to not so subtly tell me that you don't trust the DNA test. You don't believe the test, but I do. I know it might be hard for you to accept that there are guys out there who would actually like to be a part of their kid's lives because Christopher was always so good at playing the absentee father, but that isn't me."

"Hey," Lorelai shot back at him. "That was low and this is not about Chris and Rory. I know you're upset but you have no right to bring that up right now. Maybe you should take a look at why you're so quick to accept this girl out of the blue before you turn the focus on me."

Lorelai stood up and threw her purse over her shoulder. "Don't wait up for me because I might not be home," she said angrily as she stormed out of the diner. She fumed as she walked down the street. The crisp fall air felt cold, but her face was so hot she didn't notice. She had gotten a block from the diner when she heard her phone ring. She rolled her eyes and dug through her purse.

"What?" she said snippily.

"Not the hello I was looking for, but I'll take what I can get," the voice said.

"Speak of the devil," Lorelai said softly. "How are you Christopher?"

"Since we talked three days ago? Great," he answered in that suave, child-like, vintage Christopher way.

TBC


	3. All That Remains

_Author's Note: Thanks for the support on this fic. I still don't own Gilmore Girls.

* * *

_

"All That Remains"

Lorelai didn't come home that night. However, what she didn't know was that Luke had not returned either. Instead he decided to stay upstairs in his small apartment. The room once made him feel comfort and safety, but not now. He was struck by how lonely he felt lying there alone. Being left alone with only the thoughts in his head unnerved him.

He knew he'd taken a low shot at Lorelai when he mentioned Christopher. He knew that if Lorelai had her way Chris would have been a larger part of Rory's life. He knew that she'd always left the door open to him and it wouldn't have mattered if Rory had been five or fifteen, if Christopher was ready to be a part of her life he'd have all the access he wanted to her. Maybe that was things that bugged Luke the most. It seemed Lorelai's mentality when it came to Christopher being a father was to have an open door policy and she supported him no matter what. Luke felt like he was trying to get to know his daughter and he wasn't being given the same consideration. He felt like Lorelai would rather him forget he had a child.

Luke sighed and he rolled over in bed. It felt big and empty. He remembered the day Lorelai suggested upgrading to a bigger bed and he told her he didn't need one. Right now the vacant space on the other side of the bed just reminded him of how lost he felt.

* * *

Lorelai tossed and turned for about an hour before she grabbed the remote control and turned on the television. She looked around the room and marveled at how different the inn looked from a guest's perspective. She had decided to stay at the inn and not go home that night just in case Luke was there. In her heart she knew that he was probably staying above the diner but she didn't want to take a chance.

Lorelai flipped through the channels and her mind whirled from the day's events. She'd met April and the little girl seemed very nice. She didn't really look like Luke and that was some comfort to Lorelai. She remembered when Rory was about seven. She had started to look like a carbon copy of Christopher and it hurt like hell. For some reason Lorelai had pictured April to be the spitting image of Luke. Seeing Luke's eyes staring back at her in a child that was stranger to her would have been more than she could take.

Consciously Lorelai knew that Luke was a father. She saw the proof before her eyes mere hours ago. However, a part of her was hoping against hope that it was a mistake. How could he be so naïve to believe the DNA tests of a child? It was ridiculous and so uncharacteristic of Luke to buy into something so crazy so fast. Lorelai wondered if his quick acceptance of April as his daughter was somehow tied to his real desire for a family. Maybe he wanted children more than he'd let her believe? She knew she wouldn't resolve anything by staying awake all night and she eventually turned over and sighed.

The phone ringing loudly awoke Lorelai from her sleep. She hadn't realized she had fallen asleep, but the sun poking through the curtains alerted her to the fact that it was in fact the next morning.

"Hello?" Lorelai said picking up the phone.

"Hello," Michel's overly friendly voice came through the receiver. "This is your seven AM wake up call. I hope you slept well and you have not eaten the entire contents of the mini-bar up there. It is quite perturbing to have to restock those things after the owners decided to live it up all night."

"Good morning Michel," Lorelai said through gritted teeth. "Thanks for the wake up."

"Well it was lucky for you that I found the Post-It note you left on the computer," Michel replied. "Normally guests call us and ask to be called, but the Post-It was such as classy touch."

"Thank you Michel," Lorelai said again as she sat up. "Hey, no one is there to see me yet right?"

"No," Michel said curtly. "Am I playing your butler again? I don't have to run to your house and let your mother in do I?"

"No, I was simply asking," Lorelai grumbled. "I'm meeting someone for breakfast. I'll be down in a little while."

"I am counting the minutes," Michel replied unaffected as he hung up the phone.

* * *

Luke woke early and hurried downstairs to busy himself with work. He'd hardly slept and although he felt exhausted he knew sleep wouldn't come. As much as he willed his mind to stop thinking the thoughts rambling through his head would not abate. He figured that throwing himself into work was the only option he had when it came to escaping what had become his reality.

Luke busied himself with making coffee and stacking dishes while he waited for more customers to enter the diner. It was early on Saturday morning and aside from Kirk and Andrew no one was filing into the diner just yet. For about an hour the menial tasks kept Luke and his mind occupied until the morning rush came. Before he knew it he looked at the clock and it was already 11:30 a.m. It seemed like maybe his thoughts stayed manageable if he kept himself occupied with thoughts that didn't include April or Anna or Lorelai. That was until he heard that damn diner bell jingle and he turned to come face-to-face with his daughter.

"Hi," April said slightly out of breath. She had a bike helmet in her hand and set it on top of the counter.

"April?" Luke questioned. "What are you doing here?"

"You said I could visit," she said catching her breath.

"How did you get here? You didn't ride your bike all the way here did you?"

"Yeah," she said simply. "I needed to talk to you."

"Does your mother know you're here?"

"No," April said evasively.

"We have to call her," Luke said picking up the phone.

"You can't call her. I ran away. She doesn't know," April said alarmed.

"You ran away?" Luke said hanging the phone up again. His eyes widened when April nodded her head affirming his question.

"Upstairs," Luke said pointing a finger to the stairs. "Caesar, it's quiet out here. I'll be down in a little while."

Luke followed April up the steps and opened the door to his apartment. He pulled a chair out from the kitchen table and directed her to sit in it.

"Why did you run away?" Luke asked her. He folded his arms over his chest and waited for her reply.

"My mom said I couldn't see you anymore," April explained. "She said you knew it was better if we didn't spent time together and I knew she had to be lying so I came here."

"You rode your bike all the way from Woodbridge?"

"Uh-huh," the little girl nodded. Her eyes were slightly glassy and Luke couldn't tell if it was remnants of her cold, the wind she encountered biking or tiny tears not yet formed. He wondered if it could be a combination of all three.

"First of all," Luke said pulling out a chair and sitting across from her. "Your mom was wrong to tell you that I didn't want to spend time with you. If you want to visit then it's okay by me. But, your mom needs to be okay with it and she needs to know where you're going, got it?"

April nodded seriously. "Now," Luke continued, "Your mom told me that you have a father at home. She told me that he loves you very much and that you love him."

"But he's not my real dad," April pointed out.

"Well he might not be your biological dad, but that doesn't mean that he loves you any less. I bet he'd be pretty worried if he knew you biked all the way here."

"Are you mad?"

"I'm not thrilled," Luke said. "You're ten. Do you have idea how dangerous that was?"

"Yes," April replied grudgingly. "But I knew she was lying. I knew you'd want to see me and if I showed up you couldn't say no."

Luke rubbed his hands over his face and took a deep breath. "I understand that," he said. "But this is really something that your mother and I need to discuss. We have to decide how to work this out in a way that's best for everyone. You've got a dad and brothers and I've got a fiancée and it's a little complicated for everyone."

"I know," April said glumly. "But you're nice and my mom made it sound like we could never visit."

"We can visit," Luke said quietly. "But you can't just run off okay? Your mom and I will work this out, but until that time I have to drive you home."

"Can't I stay? I just got here," April protested.

"No," Luke said. "We have to call your mom and let her know where you are and then I have to drive you home. You can visit again when we've arranged it and you have a ride."

"Fine," April pouted.

"Okay, let's go then," Luke said. He stood up and grabbed his keys. Maybe by the time they got to Woodbridge he'd figure out what to say to Anna.

* * *

"Chris," Lorelai called as she came into the lobby of the Dragonfly. "We're all set up for you."

"I see," Christopher replied taking a look at the small buffet Lorelai had set up for them. "I really appreciate you seeing me Lore. I wasn't sure if you'd ever talk to me again after what happened at your parent's reception. There's no excuse for how I behaved."

"No, there isn't," Lorelai agreed.

"I know I apologized over the phone and through e-mail," Christopher said.

"The turtle card holding the 'I'm sorry' balloon was my favorite," Lorelai interjected.

"Yeah," Christopher sniffed. "Well there aren't enough e-cards in the world to tell you how grateful I am that you're still talking to me."

"You're Rory's dad and we're always going to be a part of each other's lives. For better or worse," Lorelai said. "How's Gigi?"

"She's okay," Christopher said. "My mom has really been helping out a lot. I think she likes the distraction."

"I'm sure," Lorelai said taking a seat. Christopher sat across from her and just looked at her. She looked as beautiful as ever and Christopher struggled internally to push the feelings he still had for her away.

"How are things?" he asked tentatively.

Lorelai knew instinctively that this was Christopher's way of inquiring about Luke without really asking. "Things are okay," she said. "I know you and Rory have talked. I don't know if she told you but Luke and I are engaged." Lorelai hadn't informed Chris that she was engaged to Luke and she felt like she had to put that piece of information out there quickly.

"Wow," Christopher replied taking a large sip of his orange juice, wishing that it had been tainted with a splash of vodka. "Congratulations. I'm surprised Luke is the marrying kind."

"What does that mean?"

"Nothing, he just seems kind of closed off," Christopher said. "But if you guys are happy then that's great."

"We are happy," Lorelai said a little too forcefully.

"Good," Christopher said sincerely.

After a moment of awkward silence Christopher decided to speak. It was his idea to meet and discuss Rory. He'd only recently been in touch with her. It seemed that she was reaching out to him in e-mails and occasional phone calls since the rift with Lorelai.

"I think Rory might be considering going back to Yale," Christopher informed Lorelai.

"Really? Did she tell you that?" Lorelai asked hopefully.

"She seems to be working it into the conversation more often than usual," Christopher said. "We met for lunch and she got that look on her face when she was talking about it."

"The glassy doe eyes?"

"The one and only," Christopher said. "She never had a good poker face. I guess she can blame me for that."

"Probably," Lorelai joked. "I'm glad you two seem to be working things out."

"And how about you and Rory? Have you talked to her since her birthday?"

"Since she moved back to Stars Hollow and didn't bother to tell me?" Lorelai asked rhetorically. "Not really."

"You two miss each other," Christopher pointed out. "You need to stop being so stubborn Lore. She really needs you."

"How do you know?"

"I know," Christopher said seriously. "This feud between the two of you is like David Lee Roth and Van Halen all over again."

"She's Halen, I'm Roth," Lorelai quipped.

"Regardless," Christopher sighed. "You need to be the one to make the first move. She got my poker face but your stubborn streak."

"It was my stubborn streak first," Lorelai mumbled. "My mother spent years honing and perfecting it before she passed it on to me."

"Lore," he said.

"I know," Lorelai conceded. "I need to be the one to do the talking and I will."

"Good," Christopher replied taking a bite of his pancakes. "So when's the wedding? I assume I won't be getting another call during the bachelorette party."

"You assume correctly," Lorelai said digging into her breakfast.

"So?"

"So what?"

"So why are you being so evasive? Aren't you excited?"

"Of course I'm excited," Lorelai protested. "Discussing my engagement to Luke with you is weird okay? You and my mother were pretty much the catalyst for a very brief, but very bad break for us."

"You broke up?" Christopher asked. He hadn't been privy to this information before now.

"Only for a little while," Lorelai said. "And we're back to normal now. Well, we were up until about a week ago anyway."

"Wait a minute, what does that mean?" Christopher pried.

"Nothing," Lorelai mumbled. She lost her composure for a moment and began to rant. "It's just, how come every time I think I have my life set up things come crashing down? I think you and I are finally gonna put things together and wham, Sherry's pregnant. Goodbye yellow brick road. I think things with Luke and I couldn't be better and then boom, Luke has a kid."

Lorelai tugged forcefully at the napkin in her hands as she spoke. "I always think I have it all figured out and then it's like the universe says, 'Wait a minute you're Lorelai Gilmore, I'm sorry, too much happiness isn't good for you.' Is it too much to ask to have things actually work out for me?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Christopher said reaching out and squeezing her hand across the table. "What's going on with Luke?"

"He just found out that he has a kid," Lorelai said simply. "A girl. She's ten."

"He didn't know about her?" Christopher asked skeptically.

"No," Lorelai shook her head forcefully. "Believe me he was as freaked out about it as I was when I found out about it. But he really wants to be a part of her life and I don't blame him for that."

"You do a little," Christopher interjected.

"No, I don't," Lorelai disagreed. "I have a kid. He's never judged me for having Rory. He's never once told me not to see her and now here I am telling him he needs to get another DNA test done. Who am I to tell him that?"

"You're his girlfriend," Christopher pointed out. "This is going to affect you as much as it affects him."

"But I should be okay with it," Lorelai replied. "I'm struggling to be okay with this and Luke never once shied away from me because of Rory. He whole-heartedly accepted her."

"But he knew about her from the day he met you," Christopher pointed out. "It's a lot different to basically have a kid thrown into the mix."

"I don't know," Lorelai replied. "I feel so guilty. I, above all people, should be able to accept this, but I'm having a really hard time with it. It's only been a few days but we've been fighting over it and it's just not good. I just don't know how to make this better."

"Maybe you can't," Christopher replied. "Maybe whatever happens needs to run its course. He just found out he has a kid and he missed ten years of her life. That has to be rough."

"I know, and here I am making it all about me. I'm a selfish, horrible person."

"You're not horrible," Christopher said. He reached across the table and took her hand.

"Don't think I didn't notice that you didn't dispute the selfish comment," Lorelai said sullenly.

"If this is meant to work out it will. The two of you will figure it out. You said it's only been a few days."

"Yeah, I guess," Lorelai said. "I'm sorry. This is about Rory, not Luke and his daughter."

"Hey, if you need someone to talk to about this then you can talk to me. I'm always there for you Lore."

"Thanks," Lorelai said. "I just wish I knew how this was going to work out. I was never good at waiting."

"No, you weren't," Christopher replied with a small grin.

* * *

Luke clutched the steering wheel tightly. He was on his way back from Woodbridge and he was trying to process what had happened. He took April back to her house and he was confronted by Bill and Anna. For some reason they decided that Luke was to blame for their daughter's Tour de Stars Hollow and they let him know it.

"I'm her father," Bill had yelled after April was ushered into the house by Anna. "You got that buddy? I've been here for the last nine years and she's more mine than she'll ever be yours."

"That's because your wife decided to keep her a secret from me," Luke hollered back.

Luke remembered the look in Bill's eyes and he thought for a moment the man might come at him. Luckily, for both men involved, Anna came out of the house and joined the conversation.

"How could you let her do this?" she asked Luke.

"How the hell was I supposed to know she was going to ride her bike miles to see me? You freaked her out by telling her I never wanted to see her again, which couldn't have been a bigger lie by the way," Luke shot at her. "She's my daughter and I want to know her."

"We're not going to let that happen," Bill said crossing his arms over his chest.

"You don't really have a say," Luke said. "She came to find me remember? I'm sorry you lied to the poor girl her entire life and now she's curious about me."

"Why do you care so much?" Anna asked him. "She doesn't need a father. April told me that you're engaged. Why do you need to include her in your life? You can start your own family with your fiancée."

"And forget I already have a daughter?" Luke asked calming down. "You'd like that wouldn't you?"

"Yes, we would," Bill said indignantly. Anna put a hand on his arm. Luke wasn't sure if it was to offer comfort or to stop him from thinking about inching any closer to Luke.

"This is a tough situation for all of us," Anna said. "It would just be easier for everyone if you didn't encourage her."

"April tracked me down okay? I was perfectly happy with my life and then she burst through the diner door and started running her own DNA tests. She came to see me without encouragement. Maybe if either of you had a clue where the hell your precious daughter was and what she was up to we wouldn't be here right now. She wants to know me and I want to know her and that's really all there is to it."

"You better get an attorney," Anna called as Luke walked away. "I won't let her see you without a court order."

"You might want to tell her that," Luke shot back without looking behind him. "Aside from that, you'll be hearing from my lawyer."

Luke pulled his truck into the driveway of Lorelai's house. In his confusion over the shouting match that took place in April's front yard he'd somehow forgotten that they weren't currently speaking and by the time he realized it he was already opening the front door.

"Hello?" Lorelai called.

Luke winced as the realization that he wasn't prepared for a discussion dawned on him.

"Babette?" Lorelai's voice called she walked toward the front door.

"Hi," Luke said as he took a deep breath.

"Hi," Lorelai replied. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm not sure," he replied.

"You're not sure?" she asked skeptically.

"If you knew the kind of day I had you'd believe me when I tell you that I didn't remember that we were fighting until I just walked through the door."

"You didn't remember?" Lorelai repeated slightly offended.

"Can we not do this now?" Luke asked. "Look, I'll walk back out the door and we can pretend that I was never here and you can still be mad at me and I can still be mad at you okay?"

Lorelai saw how tired he looked. She figured he'd slept even less than she had the night before. He looked so sad and defeated that she made a decision in that moment.

"Okay," she said. "Or, you know, we were friends before anything else right?"

"I guess," Luke replied puzzled. He wasn't in the mood for one her riddles. His mind wasn't functioning well enough to remember they were fighting, let alone well enough to decipher what she was getting at.

"Well Lorelai the girlfriend is still mad about yesterday," she said. "But Lorelai the friend thinks you look like you could use someone right now. So, I say we take off the boyfriend/girlfriend hats and just put on our friend hats right now."

Lorelai waited a moment to see Luke's reaction and he said nothing. She took the opportunity to take him by the arm and guide him away from the door and over to the couch.

"What happened?" she asked him once they were seated.

Luke licked his lips slowly and thought before he answered. He wanted desperately to tell her what had happened but he wondered if he could talk to her about April without her putting up a fight over the paternity test.

"It's okay," Lorelai said resting her hand on his knee. "Whatever it is just tell me."

"April came to see me this morning," he said with a sigh.

"Again?" Lorelai asked. "Anna didn't seem too thrilled about your visit yesterday. I'm surprised she dropped her off."

"She didn't," Luke informed her. "It seems Anna told April that I didn't want to see her. April didn't believe her and she decided to ride her bike to Stars Hollow to see me and get the true story."

"Oh Luke," Lorelai said. "She rode her bike all the way here? That's miles."

"I know," Luke replied wide-eyed. "I slept a sum total of an hour last night and then April comes in telling me she rode her bike to see me. So I try to be the responsible guy. I called Anna and let her know I'd be dropping April off and when we got there I was ambushed by Anna and Bill, who told me in no uncertain terms that I was forbidden to see April again."

"Forbidden?" Lorelai asked.

"Pretty much," Luke said. "As I was leaving Anna told me to get a lawyer if I ever wanted to see her again."

"What did you say?" Lorelai waited with baited breath. She knew the answer. She knew what he said the minute she asked the question. As much as she hoped she was wrong she knew in her heart that Luke had told her he'd get a lawyer. Lorelai braced herself for Luke's admission and told herself that she was okay with it. April was his daughter and he had every right to want to see her.

"I told her she'd hear from my lawyer," Luke said quietly. "I don't even have a lawyer. I hate lawyers and there I was screaming about how she'd hear from my lawyer. What was I thinking?"

"You were thinking that you wanted to know your daughter," Lorelai replied simply.

"Yeah," Luke said. "How crazy is this? Tell me. I mean you think it's crazy. I've only known about April for a few weeks and I'm getting a lawyer to…to what? Get visitation? Get custody? What the hell am I doing here?"

Lorelai could see Luke's mind spinning out of control. The thoughts of April had clearly baffled and consumed him for weeks and Lorelai suddenly saw how selfish she was being about the situation. She wasn't happy about April, but she wasn't tormented over it. Luke was the type of man who cared deeply and he always tried to do right by the people he loved. He was beating himself up for not being there for his child. She could see it in his eyes.

"Luke," she said soothingly taking his face in her hands. "It's okay. It's going to be okay."

"I don't know what to do," he said simply as he averted eye contact with her.

"What do you want to do?"

"I don't want to abandon her. But she has a family. She has Bill and he obviously loves her. I don't want to screw up her life."

"You won't," Lorelai reassured him. "Having you in her life would be a gift. You're an amazing man and if you think you want to be a father to April then we need to get a lawyer."

Luke looked at her and tried to look more deeply into her eyes. He wanted to know if she was being honest or just telling him what he wanted to hear because he was confused. He saw only sincerity in her eyes and he was consumed with the impulse to gather her in his arms.

"Thank you," he said taking her hand in his.

"It'll be okay," she said running her fingers down the said of his face.

Luke couldn't fight the impulse anymore and he leaned forward and pulled her face toward him. He passionately placed his lips on hers and pulled her closer. Lorelai, surprised by the gesture, responded with more intensity that she realized. She allowed Luke to pull her onto his lap and she straddled his waist as she tugged his coat off. Luke allowed her to remove his coat but not before he ran his hands down her torso slowly and deliberately. They hadn't made love since Luke told Lorelai about April and they both ached for the touch of the other.

"Lorelai," he whispered as she teased his ear lobe with her teeth.

The sound of her name on his lips made the tiny hairs on her neck stand up and she pressed her lips on his forcefully.

"Does this mean we have our boyfriend/girlfriend hats back on?" he asked between kisses.

"I'd prefer if there were no hats involved at all," she said before took his baseball cap off and tossed it across the room.

TBC


	4. Bump in the Road

_Author's Note: Sorry this update took a little longer than usual. Enjoy!_

_

* * *

_"Morning," Lorelai murmured as she felt Luke's hand run through her hair gently. He placed a quick kiss on her head. 

"Morning," he said. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"Yes you did," Lorelai replied as she propped herself up on Luke's chest. "But it's okay."

She smiled at him and suddenly Luke felt better about everything. Their relationship had been bumpy for the last week, but seeing her beautiful, bright smile seemed to reassure Luke that no matter what happened with April, they would be okay.

"I guess we never made it upstairs last night did we?" Lorelai said as she realized they were on the couch in the middle of the living room.

"No, we definitely didn't make it upstairs," Luke replied rubbing her shoulder lightly.

"I'm glad Babette and Morey are in New York for the week," she replied. "They'd have gotten quite a show since we didn't close the curtains."

Luke chuckled lightly. "Aw, let 'em watch."

Lorelai looked at Luke and her mouth hung open. "Luke Danes," she exclaimed. "You're a dirty man."

"And you love every minute of it," he replied.

"That's beside the point," she said leaning in and giving him a kiss on the lips. "What time is it?"

"Early," he said without hesitation.

"You woke me up early? We just made up. That isn't the most effective way to get back into my good graces."

"I thought making up put me back in your good graces," Luke pointed out.

"You have a point, but I really need coffee if it's early," Lorelai said and looked him hopefully. "And you make the best coffee in the entire state of Connecticut, possibly the world."

"We jumped from the best coffee in the state to the best coffee in the world?" Luke said as he shifted to get up. "That's quite a leap."

"It is, but without a cup of your coffee to wake me up I can't quite thinking clearly."

"I'll be back," Luke said standing up and giving her a peck before he pulled his jeans on quickly. He felt like he had to make up for the many days that they hardly touched due to the circumstances. He walked into the kitchen and went about preparing Lorelai's coffee.

"Hey Luke," Lorelai called into the kitchen after a few minutes. "Last night, when you talked about getting a lawyer, do you have one?"

"I have a guy who drew up the papers when I bought the building the diner is in," Luke replied. "I haven't talked to him a few years though. It doesn't matter. I think you can get a lawyer pretty easily as long as you're willing to pay."

"Right," Lorelai said sitting up and wrapping the blanket around her more tightly. "You probably have to go to a special lawyer though. One that specializes in paternity rights or something."

"Maybe," Luke called. "Hey, are you really okay with this? I know last night you said you were, but if you're not, then maybe we should talk about it."

"I'm okay with this," Lorelai said. Luke returned from the kitchen with a steaming mug of coffee and he handed it to her. He reached down and tugged his t-shirt on quickly before sitting down next to her. "Are you okay? You said you weren't sure what you wanted from all this."

"I want April to be happy," Luke said. "I don't want to take her away from her family or make things confusing for her. But, I also want to let her know that she can visit whenever she wants and I'd like to be able to see her every once in a while. I don't know that I'll be able to do that without getting a lawyer."

"Okay," Lorelai said as she sipped her coffee. "Then we'll get a lawyer."

"I'm sorry about all this," Luke said. "I never expected anything like this would ever happen to me—to us. I know it's not easy."

"It's fine," Lorelai said feeling resolved. She agreed with Luke. Things wouldn't be easy. They might not have the life she envisioned. She wouldn't be the mother of Luke's only child, but she was determined to support him. "Things can't be easy all the time. We'll get through this."

"Thank you," Luke said taking her free hand.

"You're welcome," she said and for the first time in a week she actually meant what she said sincerely.

* * *

Lorelai winced when she heard the lawyer's advice. She wondered if Luke would put up a fight and he had, albeit a small one. In fact, she was surprised by how little convincing it had taken to persuade him. 

"The first thing we'll need to do is establish paternity," the Henry informed them.

"It's been established," Luke piped up.

"You've had a DNA test?" he asked.

"Yes," Luke said.

"What lab did the testing?" Henry asked getting ready to make a note.

"Uh, April's uncle oversaw the testing somewhere," Luke said. "I don't know the name of the lab."

"Wait, the DNA tests were presided over by a relative of the girl?" he asked.

"Yes, he's a scientist of some sort," Luke replied hesitantly. He had never thought about how ridiculous it seemed. Lorelai had been completely correct when she told him that listening to the word of a ten-year-old girl was crazy. He had never had to explain to someone he didn't know before and now he began to see her point.

"Well that's inadmissible," Henry said dismissively. "The test has to be done by an independent lab technician. If the girl's mother is as hesitant as you say she is to all this we'll probably have to take her to court to get the testing done.

"But the test has been done," Luke insisted feebly. "Why do we have to go through it again?"

"Because it's the law Mr. Danes," Henry replied.

"Fine," Luke said grudgingly. "Just tell me what I have to do."

It had taken about an hour to go over all the details of Luke's case. Lorelai sat by quietly and saw how Luke would get defensive and frustrated with the line of questioning. She watched Luke's face as they left Henry Gantry's office. She could see the frustration in his furrowed brow.

"You okay?" she asked.

"No," Luke said bitterly. "I have to take another DNA test, which I'll probably have to get a court order for, my dirty laundry will be aired in public and I realize now how stupid I sounded taking the word of a ten-year-old for DNA results."

"You weren't stupid," Lorelai insisted. "You believed April. She's a cute kid, I'm sure the face was something to be reckoned with."

"Yeah, but that isn't me," Luke chastised himself. "I never take the word of anyone, let alone a ten-year-old Mr. Wizard."

"You've had a lot to contend with," Lorelai said. "You'll get the DNA test and then you'll know for sure."

"We've got to win a court case first," Luke pointed out.

"No judge in his right mind would say no," Lorelai said. "A lot of people don't own up to their responsibilities. I've never heard of a judge turning someone away for wanting to be a part of their child's life. I mean, unless they're a crack addict or someone really horrible or unfit, which you aren't, so I have no doubt things will go according to plan."

She gave him that bright, happy smile and Luke returned it. He finally felt like things were coming into place. Sure, it wasn't the exact life he envisioned for himself, except the being with Lorelai part of it, but it seemed to be working. Lorelai was warming up the idea of April, as was Luke, and things were moving forward. It might not be the idyllic life he had hoped for, but somehow it seemed right, if not better, than what he'd imagined.

* * *

As Luke was unpacking his morning bread delivery he heard his cell phone ring. He knew that there was no way Lorelai was awake and he wondered who could be calling. He didn't bother to check the caller ID. He just answered the phone. 

"Hello?" he said.

"Hi Luke," April's voice said quietly.

"April?" Luke asked. It was amazing how he could recognize her voice after only a few scant phone conversations. Although, on the other hand, he didn't have many ten year old girls calling him either.

"Yeah, it's me," she whispered.

"Is everything okay?" Luke asked suddenly alarmed. Luke never thought he had that worrying gene that seemed to go along with most parents, but April's voice made him feel like something might be wrong.

"Yeah, I'm okay," April assured him. "I'm supposed to be getting ready for school."

"Geez, you have to get up awfully early for school," Luke said noting the time.

"Well my ride comes early because there are other kids to pick up," April explained. "My mom told me that I can't come to the diner anymore. She was pretty mad that I came to visit you the other day."

"Yeah, well you should have told her where you were going," Luke said. "You know, just because your mom said you can't visit doesn't mean I don't like when you visit. But, I do think it's best to listen to her rules for now."

"I probably have to go to the doctor next week," April said switching gears. Luke never realized how quickly children changed the subjects of conversations. Luckily he'd had many years of practice with Lorelai for these types of conversations. "My mom says that there is a judge who is probably not going to believe my DNA test results."

"Yeah," Luke said uncomfortably. "See, if we want to be able to visit with each other my lawyer thinks that we need an independent DNA test."

Luke suddenly felt very bad about putting April through a DNA test. He hadn't really thought about the repercussions of hiring a lawyer and forcing the visitation issue.

"I did the test right you know," April informed him. "I had all the hairs from my samples and my uncle helped me. He's a lab technician."

"I know. I read the report," Luke said with a grin. "They might have a more comprehensive test though."

"Do you think they'll take blood? I hate the sight of blood. I did my testing with hair because it was easier to collect than saliva, but I know they sometimes do DNA tests with blood."

"I'm not really sure," Luke said not having thought about it. He wasn't fond of doctors or hospitals. In fact, he hadn't really thought about what the DNA test would entail if he was successful in court. Luke's stomach turned as he thought about it. The sight of blood didn't so much bother him. It was more seeing other sick people. That, coupled with the fact that a doctor with a large needle would be extracting blood-the body's very life source-_from_ his body was slightly disconcerting to him.

"I hope they just use a cotton swap in my mouth," April continued. "That would be easier I think. Plus, it is just as accurate as a blood test in most cases."

"Really?" Luke said feigning interest. He wasn't really interested in hearing any more about medical procedures than he needed. "Hey April, does your mom know you're talking to me?"

"No," the girl admitted sheepishly. "She said I shouldn't see you, but she didn't say anything about calling you and you said I could call you anytime."

"I know I did," Luke replied. "I just don't want you to break your mom's rules. I don't want you to get in trouble."

"She's taking care of my brothers anyway," April said. "She won't notice I promise."

"Okay," Luke said skeptically.

"I'm going on a field trip today," April informed Luke. "We're going to Camp Firefly. I always wanted to be a Girl Scout, but since mom works at night I could never make it to any of the meetings. I think the best thing about being a Girl Scout would be eating the cookies though."

"Oh yeah, which ones are your favorites?" Luke asked in an attempt to get to April a bit better.

"I like the ones with the coconut and the chocolate," April said.

"Yeah, those Girl Scouts sure know how to ruin a healthy piece of fruit," Luke commented.

April giggled into the phone. "You're funny," she said. She chuckled for another moment before she hurriedly said, "Well I have to get ready for school. It was nice talking to you Luke."

"It was nice talking to you too," Luke said almost bashfully.

Luke hung up the phone and felt a sensation that he rarely felt. He had a similar feeling once or twice in regards to Rory. Her sixteenth birthday and her high school graduation, it was a fatherly feeling if he ever had one. There was something about talking to April that made him feel that she was a part of him, and, quite possibly, a better version of himself. Although they didn't look that much alike and April obviously had many characteristics that didn't exactly scream that he was her father, he just knew deep down that he was. Now all he had to do was get a court order to have another DNA test to prove it.

TBC


	5. Kismet

_Author's Note: Since the last chapter was shorter than usual and mostly filler to get where I needed it to go you get two chapters in one day. Enjoy!

* * *

_

"Kismet"

Leaving the courtroom Luke felt somewhat victorious. As his lawyer had predicted Anna and Bill wanted to put a stop to his lawsuit and they had refused to let April undergo another DNA test. Anna had thought that Luke would be unwilling to go through the legal trouble of hiring a lawyer and forcing the issue in court. She underestimated the anger that he held in his heart for missing ten years of his child's life.

"Are you happy now?" Anna asked she brushed passed Luke coming out of the courthouse.

"I'm very satisfied," Luke replied shoving his hands in his pockets. "I told you I wasn't letting this go."

"Obviously," Anna said. "I hope you know what you're putting April through. She shouldn't have to go through this."

"Maybe you should have thought about that before you kept her hidden from me for the last ten years," Luke said casually. "If I'd known about her back then we wouldn't be here now."

"And where would we be?" Anna asked. "Do you honestly believe you would have been a stand-up guy and stayed with me? We hardly knew each other. You'd come in three times a week, have dinner, get drunk and whine to me about your girlfriend. You were just someone for me to talk to while I was at work because you were more coherent than the other drunks I served."

Luke was stung by her words. Through it all Luke had only somewhat fond memories of Anna and the time they shared in that dingy bar. He didn't know if she meant what she said. He guessed that she probably did. He knew he was in bad shape back then, but she didn't have to throw it in his face.

"No, I probably wouldn't have stayed with you," Luke said spitefully. "But at least I would have known I had kid and I would have helped out in any way I could. I just want April to be able to know me if she wants and I don't trust you to allow that to happen."

Luke walked away quickly before he said anything he'd regret, but the anger burned within his gut. He'd felt he'd earned a small victory in court that day, but Anna's hostility destroyed his contentment. Luke walked to his car and pulled at the tie around his neck. There were very few times in his life that Luke remembered feeling happy while he was dressed up and coincidentally each happy memory he had being dressed up included Lorelai. Other than those few times Luke felt that suits meant bad news: funerals, bank meetings, court dates. He got to his truck and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket.

"Hey, it's me," he said when Lorelai's phone went to voicemail. "I thought you might like to know that we won the motion for another DNA test today. I know you had a pretty busy day with e conference and lunch with Rory. I hope it went well and I'll see you when I get back to town."

Luke hung up the phone feeling disappointed that he didn't get a chance to speak to Lorelai. He knew that she had a conference at the inn that day and that she was having lunch with Rory so she would be busy, but it would have helped him to hear her voice. He knew that she wouldn't be thrilled by the news, but he hoped she would continue to be supportive. Since hiring a lawyer Lorelai was very supportive of Luke's decision to go forward with court proceedings. He knew that deep down she was still slightly disappointed that he had a child, but she didn't show it. She was at every meeting and helped him with every decision he'd made about April so far.

Luke wondered why he had put off telling her about April for so long and he knew deep down that it was because he knew the news of her existence was hurtful. He hadn't meant to keep it from her, but he did. He hadn't meant to disrupt their lives, but he had. But now that he'd won the court order for a DNA test he felt like their lives might be settling down. Once he won visitation they'd have a plan, a schedule, that could be relied on to make their lives a little more normal. Luke thought that having April over might be like Lorelai's Friday night dinners, only, hopefully without the tears and hard-feelings. Luke pulled his truck out of the parking lot and felt better about things as he drove back home.

* * *

"I'd say that went well," Christopher said as Lorelai cleared the table.

"Yeah," Lorelai replied. "I really appreciate you being here Chris. I know it sounds silly, but I was so worried that Rory and I would have nothing to talk about after all this time."

"And you couldn't have been more wrong since I probably clocked about five minutes of total speaking time in the two hours it took us to have lunch."

"I know," Lorelai smiled. "She looked good didn't she? She seemed happier than I've seen her in a while."

"I think it was because she was back at home with you," Christopher said picking up a plate and helping her clear the table.

Lorelai just smiled as she picked up the remaining flatware from the table.

"So you were able to take the whole afternoon off? I thought you had a conference or something at the inn?" Christopher asked.

"Yeah, I did," Lorelai said. "In fact I should probably get back as soon as possible. Michel said he had everything under control but I feel kind of bad leaving him alone."

"Sookie is there right? I'm sure they can handle it."

"I'm sure they can too," Lorelai said. "When Rory called and wanted to have lunch I was afraid to ask to reschedule. I thought she might change her mind or something."

"She wouldn't do that," Christopher said. "So, can I ask where Luke is today? I figured he'd be here cleaning his guns if he knew I was coming over."

Lorelai swallowed deeply and felt the guilt creep into her stomach. She hadn't told Luke that she'd been talking to Christopher and occasionally having lunch with him to discuss Rory. She knew that this was their tricky area. She further knew that not telling Luke about Christopher was where she made her mistake the last time around, but with everything going on in their lives Lorelai knew that Christopher's presence would only make Luke crazy. She had successfully avoided any and all talk of Chris for weeks.

"Lore?" Christopher asked when she didn't respond to his comment about Luke. "You told him I was coming right?"

"Huh?" Lorelai said pretending not to have heard him.

"You didn't tell him I was coming over for lunch," Christopher said knowingly. "Why didn't you tell him?"

"Luke has had a lot on his plate with April lately," Lorelai tried to explain herself. "I didn't want to upset him."

"And lying to him won't be at all upsetting to him?" Christopher asked.

"Of course it will. I just haven't found a good time to mention that we've been talking again."

"He doesn't even know we've been talking again?"

"No," Lorelai said sheepishly. "I didn't know how to tell him."

"You couldn't just say, 'I talked to Chris today?'"

"I didn't want him to have a stroke. Luke has this vein in his temple that tends to bulge out when your name comes up and…" Lorelai stopped and thought about it for a moment. "Look, I know I have to tell him about this and I will when the time is right. Since you don't really have any say in when I tell him I'd appreciate if you didn't bring it up."

Lorelai took a deep breath and continued to clean the kitchen while Christopher sat in silence for a moment. She hadn't realized how Christopher's insinuations were beginning to wear on her. Every time they talked or met Christopher found a way to bring up Luke and she was getting tired of it. For as grateful as she was that he was around to help her mend fences with Rory his constant comments about Luke were no longer welcome.

Once upon a time she feared that Christopher would tell Luke about the secret tequila night after his father died. She didn't honestly know if he would have told him anything about it, but the point was that she couldn't be sure. She got a funny feeling in her stomach that Christopher still had feelings for her and he was just waiting for her relationship with Luke to end to make a move. She couldn't deny that she had feelings for him. They still lingered in the back of her mind, but Christopher would always be down the path not taken. A thousand things would have had to happen differently for them to be together, not the least of which would have been Lorelai not opening the inn and never bridging the gap between friends and lovers with Luke. Looking at it now she knew that wasn't she wanted. She realized that she hadn't learned her lesson from the first time she kept Christopher a secret from Luke and she knew she had to rectify it.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you," Lorelai said quietly. "I appreciate how helpful you've been with Rory, but I think that it might be best if you left now."

"Are you sure that's what you want?" Christopher asked standing and walking over to her. Lorelai gave him a look that seemed to ask what he was getting at. "You and I have been talking and meeting for weeks and you haven't even mentioned it to Luke. Why are you hiding it from him? Don't tell me it it's a sore spot between you Lore because I know better. I think you don't want him to know because you like spending time with me. I think you're conflicted about how you feel."

Lorelai stifled a small laugh. "You couldn't be more wrong," Lorelai replied confidently. "Christopher, I appreciate your help with Rory and you know that you're always welcome to call or visit, but you and me? We're so over that we're Donald and Ivana, Burt and Loni, Mimi Rogers and Tom Cruise, which, can I just say how happy Mimi must be that she got out before the crazy took over Tom?"

"I think you still have feelings for me," Christopher said insolently. "I don't believe that you're over it just like I'm not over it. You're always going to wonder what it could have been like with us."

"You're right, I might always wonder in the back of mind what it would have been like," Lorelai admitted. "But that ship as sailed Chris. And if finding out what it would be like to be with you comes at the expense of my relationship with Luke then it's totally not worth it. Besides we'd probably be together for a few weeks and realize that we're not 16 anymore. What you and I had was a young love and what Luke and I have is just beyond love. I know it probably seems weird to you, but trust me when I tell you that Luke and I are kismet okay?"

"Then why haven't you told him about our meetings?" Christopher tried one last time. He saw the resolved look in her eyes and he knew it was pointless to hope anymore. He'd never seen her look more resolved about another man in her entire life.

"I haven't told Luke because he's going through a lot right now and he doesn't need to deal with the stress of you being around again. But, you helped me realize that not telling him is a really dumb thing to do. I guess I didn't learn my lesson from the last time around, but I see it now. I am completely and totally in love with him. I know you don't want to hear that but I think you need to. I love Luke and we're getting married and no amount of curiosity about us could get me to change my mind. I'm telling Luke all about this tonight."

"What are you telling me about tonight?" Luke's voice asked as he walked into the kitchen. At first he didn't notice Christopher standing so close to Lorelai but when he did he felt his fist clench unconsciously. "What are you doing here?" Luke asked tersely.

"Chris was just leaving," Lorelai said taking him by the arm and leading toward the front door quickly.

"I'm not leaving quite yet," Christopher said as Lorelai pushed him to the door.

"Oh you're going one way or another," Luke said. He just stood staring him down as Lorelai ushered Christopher passed.

"Please go," she told Christopher fiercely. She lowered her voice as she handed him his jacket. "We've said all there is to say. Thank you for helping me with Rory."

Lorelai didn't give him a chance to fight her before she pushed him out the door and locked it tightly behind him. She scurried back into the kitchen to see that Luke had removed his jacket and tossed it carelessly over the chair. He was wringing his tie in his hands.

"What was he doing here?" Luke asked.

"I have to start back a little bit farther to explain what Chris was doing here now," Lorelai said.

Luke nodded tensely and anticipated that he wouldn't like what he was about to hear. He tossed his tie over the chair and walked over to the refrigerator and pulled out a beer. He cracked the cap and took a large sip before he sat down at the table.

"Please explain," he said.

"Christopher and I have been talking," Lorelai said as she tried to keep her heart rate steady. She felt as if it might burst out of her chest at any moment. "He had been e-mailing me and he apologized about the drama he caused at my parent's wedding. I hadn't responded to any of it until one day he called me and he wanted to talk about Rory."

"Rory?" Luke asked skeptically.

"Apparently she started calling him because she wasn't talking to me," Lorelai continued. "So I talked to him about Rory and we met for lunch a few times."

Lorelai took a moment and noticed that the expression on Luke's face hadn't changed with her admission. Likewise, he didn't open his mouth to speak. He simply waited for her to continue.

"So you know Rory called and asked if we could have lunch," Lorelai said. "And I was so excited that she called that I agreed and I was looking forward to it. But then the more I thought about it the more nervous I got. I remembered how hard it was to talk to her at her birthday party and so I called Christopher and asked him if he wanted to join us for lunch. He was only here to be a buffer for us in case things got awkward."

"Did they?" Luke asked.

"Did they what?" Lorelai asked puzzled by his question.

"Did things get awkward?" Luke sighed.

"Oh. No, they didn't," Lorelai said. "It went really well actually."

"Good," Luke replied stoically. Luke stood up and walked over to the sink. He gazed out the window for a minute and he took another long sip of his beer. Lorelai had never seen Luke so pensive. She couldn't tell if it was a good sign or not. She had expected him to yell, which he hadn't and her only other thought was that he would leave and hadn't done that either. He just stood, thinking.

"So you and Rory are talking again?" he asked not turning to face her.

"Yeah, we are," Lorelai said quietly. "Luke, I'm so sorry. I know I was wrong. I should have told you about Christopher, but he's just such a sore spot for us that I didn't want to bring it up. You had all this April stuff to think about and it seemed wrong for me--"

"It's fine," Luke cut her off as he finished his beer. He turned and leaned against the kitchen counter to face her.

"It's fine?" Lorelai asked.

"I'd have liked to have known that you were talking to him again," Luke explained. "I'd have liked to know he was going to be standing in our kitchen when I got home today, but you had your reasons for not saying anything."

"I did," Lorelai said in disbelief of Luke's reaction.

"I didn't tell you about April for weeks," Luke reasoned. "I should have told you, but I didn't because I didn't want to hurt you. I wanted to delay it for as long as I could because I could picture the look on your face when I told you about her. You probably imagined my reaction to this Christopher news a lot differently than how I'm reacting I'm sure."

"I really did," Lorelai confirmed. She was shocked by his response. While it was clear that Luke wasn't happy with the news, he didn't react by shouting or leaving. He simply took the news, thought about it and now, it appeared that he was willing to talk about it. "So you're okay with this?"

"I was surprised he was here," Luke replied. "I wanted to knock him on his ass. But if he's helping you get closer to Rory again then he's obviously what you need."

"I don't need him," Lorelai said standing up and walking over to him. "He was just here in case things got tricky. I wanted to ask you to be here but I didn't want Rory to feel like you and I were ganging up on her."

"And Christopher is a neutral party," Luke finished for her. "I understand."

"So we're not yelling about this," Lorelai said baffled.

"Do you want to yell about this?" Luke asked confused. He felt as though he was taking the news awfully well and yet Lorelai seemed distressed.

"No," Lorelai said wide-eyed. "I don't ever want to yell about anything. I'm just…when did we turn into such adults?"

"I don't know," Luke chuckled as he put his arm around her. "But can we make a deal?"

"Sure," Lorelai replied.

"From now on, no matter how bad we think the news is, no matter how horrible we think we might react to something, we tell each other about it anyway," Luke said. "I can't help but feel that we talk about the little things that don't matter, but we just let the big things go without mentioning them."

"Like Christopher," Lorelai said.

"Like Christopher, like April, like the kids issue, the Twickham House," Luke listed each major issue off one by one.

"So less movie talk, more important talk," Lorelai said.

"That's what I'm getting at," Luke replied.

"We can do that," Lorelai said pulling away from him and sitting back at the table. "I really am sorry about not telling you."

"It's okay," Luke said taking a seat across from her. "You were right about one thing. He is definitely a sore spot for me and it was probably best that I didn't know he was calling. But, I don't want you to think that you can't tell me. If he's helping you with Rory then you need to talk to him."

"That's all it is," Lorelai said. After a moment it dawned on her that Luke had come back from the courthouse. "Hey, how did they motion go today?"

"You've haven't checked your messages?" Luke asked.

"I left my phone at the inn," Lorelai said remembering that she left it sitting in her desk at work.

"Oh, well we won," Luke said with a small smile. "I have to report to some lab in Hartford next week and my lawyer said they'd put a rush on the results so we might know as soon as the end of the month about where we go from here."

"That's great news," Lorelai said smiling. While it was true that she wasn't thrilled with the situation she knew that it made Luke happy. She didn't want him to miss out on another minute of being a father and the holidays were fast approaching.

"I thought so," Luke said. "Are you still okay with this?"

"Of course," Lorelai said sincerely. "I just wish we didn't have to do so much waiting."

"I know," Luke replied. "I'm sure this isn't easy for you--"

"Stop," Lorelai said cutting him off. "We've had this talk and we're in this together. She's your daughter and if seeing her is what you want then I'm behind you on it."

"Thanks," Luke said reaching across the table and squeezing her hand.

"No need for thanks," Lorelai said with a grin. "Parades and national holidays named after me is all I require."

TBC


	6. The End and the Beginning

"The End and the Beginning"

Luke heard the words echo in his ears and he felt sick to his stomach. He wondered how this could have happened. He was so certain. He figured he got what he deserved for being so naïve and foolish. Lorelai had been right all along.

"Are you okay Mr. Danes?" his lawyer asked.

Luke was sitting in a chair across from this lawyer's desk and he was leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees, head down.

"I'm…yeah, I'm fine," Luke said looking up. "I'm sorry I wasted your time with all this." He willed himself to stand and look composed.

"I wouldn't call it a waste of time Mr. Danes," his lawyer replied. "Finding out that you're not biologically related to this child is going to save you a lot of time and trouble."

"Right," Luke said trying to look relieved. "Well I appreciate your time."

"If you need anything else in the future please don't hesitate to call."

"I'll be sure to do that," Luke said as he exited the office. He walked out into the cold autumn air and didn't bother to put on his jacket. It was a windy, but beautiful fall day. Most of the leaves on the tress had fallen and some were circling around his feet like miniature cyclones down the road. Luke marveled at how the birds still sang and the sun shown brightly when deep down inside he felt that his mood was more suited to rain, lightning and thunder.

He made his way to the parking lot and he stopped before reaching his car to catch his breath. He hadn't realized it but he had set off at such a brisk pace from the lawyer's office that he had actually being running to his car. It was as if he had somewhere pressing to be, when in reality he didn't.

"There is a 99.9 percent certainty that you are not this girl's father," his lawyer's voice rang in his ears.

"But there was an initial test done that said I was," Luke protested.

"I realize that and that is why I insisted the test be run again. The original samples must have been tampered with or mixed up the first time. That's why we require independent testing."

Luke thought about the little girl, April, who he thought was his daughter. She really didn't look much like him. She didn't have his mannerisms. She seemed to be brilliant, outgoing and talkative. All the traits that stuck out about her had nothing to do with Luke. The trait she possessed that Luke thought he might have been responsible for was April's brown hair. Anna also had brown hair, but it seemed lighter than his own.

Luke felt his heart beating fast and although it should have made him feel alive, somehow he didn't even realize his heart was beating. Everything seemed distant and surreal. It was almost as if he expected to wake up from a fuzzy dream, but that wasn't going to happen. He didn't have a conscious thought for destination in his mind when he got into the truck and started it. It wasn't until he was pulling into Anna's driveway that he realized where he'd driven.

Luke got out of the car and stomped up the front steps to the front door. He balled his hand into a fist and banged on the door with all his might. He knew that Anna didn't work during the day and that she was home. She eventually answered the door and Luke gave her a hard stare.

"I assume you know," he said bitterly.

"Yes, our lawyer called this morning," she replied coming out onto the porch and closing the door behind her lightly. "Could you lower your voice? The boys are sleeping."

"I don't really care about the boys Anna," Luke said tersely. "I care about the fact that you had me believing that I was April's father and I'm not."

"I didn't have you believing anything," she defended herself. "I didn't know April was doing these tests in the first place."

"My life has been turned upside down over this," Luke said. "I was having a contractor rethink the floor plan of my house to accommodate April's visits. I was getting used to the idea that I had a daughter and now I have nothing."

"I never asked you to do that," Anna said. "I never asked for your help or your input. You took it upon yourself to rethink floor plans and talk to April okay? Let's get that straight because I never asked for you to be in the picture."

"But I was," Luke said tersely. "Do you have any idea how this has affected me?"

"No I don't," Anna replied a bit unsympathetically. "I never wanted you in the picture. To be honest with you I never thought you were really her father. I'm sorry that there was something missing in your life that you felt you had to cling onto the idea that April was your daughter, but she's not. I think I'm well within my rights to ask you to just stay away. I'll tell April that you're not her father and when she's 30 we'll look back on this as barely a memory."

Luke stood flabbergasted for a moment when both he and Anna heard a car drive up into the driveway. April, her messy hair in pigtails, hopped out of the car and a smile spread across her face when she saw Luke. She ran over to her mother and Luke.

"Hi," she said happily.

"Hi April," Luke replied unsure of how to react to her. He had grown fond of her in their few visits and phone conversations.

"Did you come to visit me?" she asked. "I got an A on my book report. I did it on _The Face on the Milk Carton_ because it reminded me of us a little bit."

"April, why don't you go inside," Anna said sweetly and she ushered her daughter toward the door.

"Why? Can Luke come in too? I was going to ask him to come to my school on career day," April told her mother. "Do you want to Luke? Everyone else's fathers have boring jobs in banks and stuff, but I think owing a diner is cool."

"April, please go inside," Anna said trying to usher her daughter inside the house.

"Will you think about it?" April asked Luke with wide eyes. Luke looked in her eyes and saw how big and round and innocent they were. She was asking him to be a part of her life. Luke wondered why this girl who was cute and smart and amazing had clung to him so quickly. He wondered why he had taken to her so easily if she wasn't his daughter. Was Anna right? Was there something missing in his life that made him susceptible to the charm of this little girl?

"April we need to talk," Luke said. He'd made the split second decision to tell April that he wasn't her father himself. He didn't care what Anna wanted or needed. Right now he only cared about the fact that he had to let this child go as much as it killed him to do it.

"No, you don't," Anna said alarmed.

"Please Anna," he said quietly. "Just let me be the one to do this."

Anna saw the sincere pain in Luke's eyes and she relented. "Fine," she said. She let go of April's shoulder and allowed her daughter to walk over to the man she thought was her father. "I'll be right over there," Anna said indicating that she'd be on the large porch sitting in the whicker chair.

"What's going on?" April asked.

"How about if we sit down," Luke said indicating the steps on the front porch.

"Okay," April said hesitantly. "Do you not want to come to career day? You don't have to if you don't want. I just thought it might be fun for us to do together."

"It would be fun," Luke said sitting down next to her. "But I think you might want to have your dad go with you."

"You are my dad," April said.

Luke took a deep breath and summoned the courage to break the girl's heart. "I know that's what we thought," Luke began. "But sometimes what you think and what's real are two different things."

"What are you talking about?" April asked.

"Families are made up of a bunch of different people," Luke said trying to explain this to her in the easiest way he knew. "Sometimes there are stepfathers and sometimes there are half-brothers, but in the end it doesn't really matter if you're blood-related or not."

"Okay," April said not following Luke at all.

"The thing is," Luke tried to explain when he sensed her confusion. "I think you're a wonderful little girl. You're a lot smarter than most of the adults that I know and I feel lucky that you'd even want me to be your father."

"You don't want to be my dad?" April asked suddenly. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no that that's not what I'm trying to say," Luke said quickly. "I'd be honored to be your dad and I've just come to realize how just how much I really wanted to be. But I got the results of our second DNA test today and it says that I'm not your dad."

"Yes you are," April said, her pale green eyes filling with tears. "I did the test myself. I know you're my dad!"

"I'm not April," Luke said trying to keep the girl calm. He felt a familiar pressure in his chest and he thought for a moment that it might kill him.

"Yes you are," April yelled. "Why don't you want to be my dad? I know you are!"

"April, sweetie, he's not your dad," Anna said walking over and trying to comfort her daughter.

"I know he is. I did the results myself."

"They were wrong honey," Anna said rubbing her back. "The lab did the test twice and Luke isn't your father."

"I'm sorry," Luke said feebly standing.

"It's not fair," April said as she began to cry harder. "I know I did the test right."

"I know you thought you did sweetheart," Anna said.

"Does this mean I'm never gonna see you again?" April cried.

"You can visit the diner with your family any time you want," Luke said as his heart was breaking.

April continued to cry and she buried her head into Anna's shoulder. Anna gave Luke a look that was, for the first time, sympathetic. She sort of cocked her head to the side and Luke knew that it would be best for him to go now. April wasn't taking the news well and it would be easier if he weren't around.

Luke walked down the steps and started across the yard to his truck. He hadn't gotten very far when he heard April wail, "I wanted it to be him."

Luke felt as if someone had knocked the wind out of him. "Me too," he murmured to himself as he hopped into his truck and backed down April's driveway for the last time.

* * *

"Luke?" Lorelai called as she walked across the lawn to the bench where he was seated. She had been looking for him for the last few hours. They had made plans to meet for dinner and when Luke didn't show up at the inn she became alarmed. After calling the diner she found out that Luke had gotten a call from his lawyer and went to a meeting. Lorelai wasn't sure what the lawyer could have told Luke, but she worried until she saw him sitting on a bench in the park.

"Luke," she said as she got closer. "I was so worried about you. How long have you been sitting here?" She sat down next to him and noticed that his eyes looked puffy. If she didn't know any better she would have thought that Luke had, at some point that evening, been crying.

"What happened?" she asked him.

Luke turned to look at her as if she were an apparition. He had left April's around four o'clock and taken the longest route he could think of to get home. For some reason he decided to drive by his childhood home, the lake where he fished with his father, the high school and the tea room where his mother taught him which fork was used for salad and which was used for a meal. By the time he parked his truck he had forgotten about dinner and wandered over to the bench on which he was currently sitting. Nothing about the entire day had seemed real until he let his eyes focus on Lorelai.

Luke saw her empathetic face and her bright blue eyes and he wanted to lose himself in her forever. He reached out and threw his arms around her and she returned his hug tightly.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"I'm fine," he said quietly. He pulled away from her and said simply, "She's not mine."

"What?" Lorelai said confused.

"Henry called me this afternoon," Luke began. "He said I needed to go to his office. I thought it had something to do with the case and a court date or something. When I got there he pulled out the new lab's DNA test result. It turns out you were right. I'm not April's father."

"Oh Luke," Lorelai said putting her arm around his shoulder. "I'm so sorry."

"Yeah," Luke scoffed. "I don't know what is wrong with me. I shouldn't be like this. How long did I really know her? A few weeks?"

Lorelai didn't know what to say in response to his question. She didn't know what was going through Luke's mind, but one thing was obvious—Luke had desperately wanted April to be his daughter. He wanted a child. Lorelai didn't have a chance to say anything before Luke continued to speak.

"The crazy thing is that I don't know anything about kids," Luke continued. Lorelai sensed a full rant coming. "I don't even particularly like them. I've told you this before. They're sticky and bouncing and one minute they're here and the next they're somewhere else. They should sell bells that you can attach to them like a collar just to keep track of them. But there was something about April."

"You thought she was yours," Lorelai said quietly. "It's different when they're yours."

"I guess," Luke mumbled. "I'm sorry. We were supposed to meet for dinner. Is it too late?"

Luke shifted on the bench and made a motion to stand until Lorelai pulled him back down on the bench.

"It's not a big deal," Lorelai said. "I'm not hungry."

"You're always hungry," Luke countered.

"Well I'm not hungry now," Lorelai said. "Does Anna know that you're not April's father?"

"Yeah," Luke sighed as he settled back down on the bench. "I went over there."

"You went to Anna's house?"

"I don't know what I was thinking. No, wait, I _wasn't_ thinking. I got the news from Henry and I jumped in the truck and started driving. It was like I didn't have a conscious thought. I still don't know how I got there, but I did. It was like Anna didn't even care. She was almost relieved that I wasn't April's dad."

"I'm so sorry," said as she rubbed his back gently.

"That's not even the worst part," Luke scoffed. "The worst part was when April came home from school and invited me to the career day at her school. Apparently all the other dads are bankers and that's boring. Since I own a diner she wanted me to go."

Lorelai just waited for Luke to continue his story knowing that nothing she said in response could make him feel any better.

He took a deep breath as if to compose himself before he continued. "I told her that I'd like to go, but her dad should probably go with her and then," Luke's voice broke slightly but he did not cry. He cleared his throat lightly. "I told her that I wasn't her father."

Lorelai bit her upper lip in an attempt to stop her eyes from welling up with tears. She had never seen Luke this upset before and it killed her that she couldn't do anything to alleviate his pain.

"Luke," Lorelai started to say before his hand in the hair to stop her. It was as if he was telling her that if she spoke he might lose the composure he barely had a grip on.

"I'll be fine," he lied.

"What can I do?" Lorelai asked. "Tell me how to make this better."

"Being here with me is good," he said. "I should have called you. I'm sorry."

"You had a lot on your mind," Lorelai said.

"Yeah," Luke said absently. He thought for a moment before he decided to tell Lorelai how he'd spent his day. "You know, I was going to call you. I was getting ready to let you know about what happened and then I drove past the lake. I was driving home and I passed the lake and I thought about my dad. My dad wasn't a kid person. He was more of a hands-on, get your clothes dirty guy. He was great at building forts and fixing bikes but he was never the guy who'd give you a hug because you looked sad you know?"

"Sure," Lorelai replied. "My dad wasn't either. Of course my dad wasn't really the hands-on, get dirty kind of guy either."

"Yeah. You know even though he wasn't touchy-feely I knew that he loved me. We'd go fishing or work on that stupid boat together. He and my mom couldn't have been more different. I remember this one Thanksgiving."

Luke chuckled to himself before he continued. "My mom bought me this awful clip on tie and she spent hours coaxing me into these horrible brown slacks. She was so proud of my appearance. Well my dad came back from the store and he took me out to the garage to help him cut some wood. Of course he didn't notice my clothes and my mom was too preoccupied with Liz to notice I'd gone. The look on her face when I came in full of saw dust and primer was priceless."

"How old were you?"

"I must have been about seven or eight," Luke answered. "I'd never seen her that mad at my dad before. Of course he didn't have a clue why she was so upset. They were so different. They kind of remind me a little bit of us."

"Really?" Lorelai asked. Luke had nothing but find memories of his childhood and she knew his parents were very much in love. It made Lorelai happy to know that he compared their relationship to that of his parent's.

"Sure," Luke said. "Although I'd hope I would know better than to take our son out back to work in the garage on Thanksgiving."

"Our son?" Lorelai asked uneasily.

"Or daughter," Luke corrected himself. "I suppose girls don't like that kind of stuff huh?"

"Probably not," Lorelai said swallowing hard. "Luke, did we ever come to a decision on kids?"

"I'm sorry?" he asked.

"Well I know we talked about having kids sort of, but did we ever come down on a side?"

"I thought we decided yes," Luke said.

"I thought you were worried about being too old for kids," Lorelai reminded him.

"I don't think we should wait years if that's what you're asking," Luke replied. "I think that I'm probably going to be the old dad, but it's something I can live with. Where is this coming from?"

"You were just talking about kids like we were definitely for sure going to have them and I wasn't sure if we'd decided for sure."

"I thought we had."

"I didn't."

Luke sighed. "What are you telling me? Or, better yet, what are you not telling me?"

"I don't think we should have this conversation right now," Lorelai said trying to side-step the conversation.

"You started the conversation," Luke said. "Let's have it."

"Luke you just found out that April isn't your daughter and you're obviously upset about it. I don't think this is the best time to talk about this."

"You don't want kids," Luke said knowingly.

"I don't know," Lorelai relented.

The muscles in Luke's neck tightened and he tried to stretch to relieve the tension. "But you were upset about this April thing because you wanted to have kids with me. At least that's what I thought."

"I thought so too," Lorelai said. "It's just that the more I thought about it the more I wondered if it was what I wanted."

"Can I ask why," Luke said trying to keep his cool.

"It's like you said," Lorelai tried to explain clearly. "You'd be the old dad and I'd be the old mom. Having Rory was a lot of work and time and I was sixteen then. I don't know that I can imagine what it would be like now. We both work and the inn is still new and needs a lot of attention."

"Sookie has two kids," Luke responded.

"I understand that," Lorelai said. "I guess I'd just like some time to really think about it."

"So, let me see if I understand this," Luke said calmly. "You had a problem with me having a kid with Anna because you always thought that any children I had would be with you. But now that April isn't mine you have a problem with having kids with me at all."

"No, I didn't have a problem with you having a daughter," Lorelai said defensively.

"Please," Luke dismissed her.

"Hey," Lorelai said getting a bit more animated. "I wasn't thrilled with the idea, but neither were you. You didn't even tell me about her for weeks and now all of a sudden you're Father Knows Best?"

"No, I'm not," Luke said standing up. "But I really got to like the idea that I had a kid. I really want to have a kid with you and now you're telling me that it's not an option."

"I'm not telling you that it's not an option," Lorelai said standing to look him in the eye. "I'm telling you that I don't know right now. I'm not going to make a rash decision about having a kid because you feel like you lost a child today. This is a major life change that you're talking about and we're not even married yet."

"Yeah because you won't set a date," Luke snapped at her.

"Now that things with Rory seem to be getting better I think we should talk about it. I thought you were okay with that?"

"I guess I thought I was, but now I don't know," Luke said mocking her earlier statement.

"I know you've had a rough day and I know this conversation isn't one you should be having right now, but you have no right to sit here all high and mighty about this."

"Whose high and mighty? I thought we were done with this conversation. I thought we decided that kids would be good. You laid next to me in my apartment and told me kids would be good and now you're changing your mind."

"I know what I said," Lorelai conceded. "I love the idea of having a child with you. But ideas and actual reality are two completely different things."

"What are you telling me?"

"I'm saying," Lorelai sighed before sitting back down on the bench. "I'm saying that I don't know what I want. As much as I'm in love with the idea of a little you running around in flannel diapers I just don't know if I'm ready to do it all again. I almost feel like this is our time. It's taken us so long to get here and maybe I'm being selfish, but I just think about how good it is right now and in a way I don't really want it to change."

Luke nodded and sat down next to her. He sat silent for a moment knowing that what he was about to say would change everything. "We don't have to decide anything right now," he said calming down as he placing his hand on her leg. "You're right. I'm not really in a place to make any life-altering decisions. I guess I was just thinking about April and my childhood and I always thought I would have a kid eventually."

"I'm sorry," Lorelai said quietly. She didn't want to discuss the topic further because she truly didn't know what to say.

They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes, both lost in their own thoughts. Lorelai felt guilty about not being able to jump on the child bandwagon and she knew there was nothing she could say or do to give Luke any comfort about April or about their conversation regarding children.

Luke knew that his fate was sealed. If he knew one thing for certain it was that Lorelai had made up her mind about children. She wasn't fully convinced that she wanted another child and there wasn't much he could say or do to change her mind. He knew she was sincere when she spoke of her fantasy of having a child with him, but he also knew that she wasn't as in love with the fantasy as he was.

Ever since they'd stated dating, before they were engaged, Luke knew that he wanted to have children with Lorelai. He'd come to realize that he'd conjured a perfect picture of what their daughter would like. It was always a girl. Most men wanted strapping boys to play catch with, but for some reason their child was consistently girl. She had Lorelai's bright blue eyes and her bubbly personality. She was self-reliant and scrappy but, unlike Lorelai, she could cook and fix things around the house. She was everything good about either of them put together and Luke realized at that very moment she was slipping away. He'd have to visit her in his mind because he knew that the chances of her actual conception were now slim to none. Luke just had to think about whether he was able to accept that.

He'd never thought about children before. He was too young when he was with Rachel. Too young and too screwed up over his life to even think of having children. Nicole? Well, Nicole wasn't mother material and Luke couldn't even imagine living with her seven days a week let alone having children with her, which was probably why their marriage ended in divorce. However, Lorelai was the exception. From day one Luke knew that if was ever going to have a child it would be with Lorelai. Now it looked like that wasn't ever going to happen. Luke realized that later on, when Lorelai was sleeping he would not only have to grieve the loss of April, but also the child he never knew he always wanted.

"You ready?" Luke asked Lorelai after a few minutes of silence.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I can't sit here anymore."

"Are we okay?"

"We're good," he said sincerely. "Let's go home."

"You know what I think you need?" Lorelai said as she stood up and Luke placed his arm around her shoulder.

"What's that?" Luke asked.

"Ice cream from that new place," Lorelai suggested. "The place where you can mix twelve different flavors and every topping you can think of together into one big bowl of goodness."

"One big bowl of death you mean," Luke said. "Do you have any idea how much fat is one scoop of that stuff?"

"Okay, how about if you order it and watch me eat it? It might make you feel better," Lorelai said.

"We'll see," he replied.

"We'll see?" Lorelai asked excited. "You've never given me that response in regard to ice cream before." Her smile was child-like and it seemed to radiate the night. Luke looked and Lorelai and suddenly felt extremely sad to know that he'd never see that expression on the face of their child.

"What the hell," Luke replied. "Let's go order some of that artery-clogging death."

"Here, here," Lorelai said. After a minute she added, "Luke, I really am sorry things didn't work out."

He knew that she meant she was sorry that April wasn't his child, but also that she wasn't sure if she wanted any more children. After all those years he could still read between the lines when she spoke to him.

"It's okay," he replied. "Let's go get some ice cream."

"Okay," Lorelai said. They walked a while before Lorelai added, "May 23rd."

"May 23rd?"

"That's when I think we should get married," she said softly.

"May 23rd it is," Luke replied as he leaned over and placed a small kiss on her forehead.

They walked through the square arm in arm, which was somewhat unusual, but then again it had been an unusual few weeks. So much had happened and yet it seemed that they were back at the beginning albeit with a much greater understanding of each other and where they were headed.

The End.

_A/N: So there you have it. This is as far as I'm taking this story. I guess the moral is that I'd rather see Luke an emotional wreck than have him be the father of April. I'd also rather have the conflict between Luke and Lorelai be internal rather than Christopher. I hope you've enjoyed this and thanks for sticking with me even though it is based on a very unpopular spoiler._


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